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3 Life Lessons for Dog Moms by Dr. Julie Buzby

Julie Buzby, DVM August 8, 2016 13 Comments

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3 Life Lessons for Dog Moms by Dr. Julie Buzby

Leverage. It is a principle my dad drilled into my head growing up. Finding a way to do more with less was his life mission. Naturally, this mindset spilled over into my life. We use leverage to accomplish our ToeGrip’s company mission:

To preserve mobility for as many dogs as possible for as long as possible.

On the surface, it looks as if we are a dog-centric business. Certainly true, but that’s not the entire picture. We figured out early on that if we were REALLY going to help dogs, the most impactful way to do that was by helping PEOPLE to help their dogs. And this revelation would have made my dad proud. Every single day we leverage empowered humans to transform dogs’ lives.

dogs and humans comfort each other
Helping dogs live the happiest, healthiest life possible.

This “leverage” principle rings true in veterinary medicine. During routine wellness exams, I might care for a patient for 30 minutes, a couple times a year. The client is the daily caregiver, personal trainer, chef, and life coach for that pet. Often, my REAL work is to leverage my clients to care for my patients with competence and confidence. To me, it’s the “wholistic” approach to pet wellness—creating informed, inspired humans who are equipped to provide healthy, happy lives for pets.

“Client education” has always been one of my favorite parts of  being a veterinarian. When the lightbulb goes on for a client about some aspect of home care, there is joy in that transfer or information, and hope for bettering a pet’s life in some way. Typically I stick to the script. We might cover tips for administering a medication, how to change a bandage, or symptoms of hypothyroidism in dogs.

But I hope you don’t mind if I veer off course to highlight three life lessons that aren’t rooted in veterinary science. I’ve learned them, or should I say I’ve “earned them”, caring for my clients, patients, eight human children, and three dogs. Consider it a heart-to-heart talk from one mom to another.

3 Life Lessons from integrative veterinarian Dr. Julie Buzby 

Dr. Julie Buzby’s Life Lesson #1: Mom guilt gets you nowhere.

“Do-overs” only happen when playing board games with small children. In reality, we don’t have the luxury of playing out our “what ifs”.

Don’t invest energy reliving an outcome that you wish you could change, because you can’t change it. Languishing over the situation is not healthy for you or those who love you.

And what’s more, in my observation, usually mom guilt is unfounded. I’m stunned by the number of clients I’ve talked to over the years who are obsessed with something in their dog’s past medical history) that they feel was their fault. As I learn the details, I’m often convinced they are agonizing over something that was beyond their control. But here’s the real message: Even if it were under their control, even if a mistake were made, there is no benefit to brooding over it. 

Do the best you can and rest in the fact that you did your best. ~ Dr. Julie Buzby Click To Tweet
black lab dog with dog mom hugging dog
Dogs live in the moment. When it comes to mom guilt, we should follow their lead.

Dr. Julie Buzby’s Life Lesson #2: Don’t be afraid to speak up.

Quote by integrative veterinarian Dr. July Buzby says Be informed. Be curious. Be proactive in your role as your dog's voice.

I will never forget the moment Dr. Whitman pressured me into vaccinating my three-month-old (human) baby who had a low-grade fever, while I kept my mouth shut. He owned the practice. He was the expert. He was calling the shots.

I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that his plan was not in the best interest of the baby in my arms, but I didn’t want a confrontation. My newborn son relied on me to be his voice, yet I gave him none. (By the way, such experiences are fodder for Lesson #1.)

What I eventually learned to do in these situations was to ask my questions and state my concerns with the goal of having a conversation with the doctor. Typically, we landed on the same page, but not always. Remember, you always have the option of getting a second opinion—whether it be from a different doctor in the same practice, a veterinarian at a different practice, or through referral to a specialist.

Never hesitate to ask questions. If you have a concern about your dog’s well-being, share it with your dog’s healthcare providers.

Be informed. Be curious. Be proactive in your role as your dog’s voice. ~ Dr. Julie BuzbyClick To Tweet
dog on exam table in vet office
Dogs can’t speak for themselves. We are their voice in the world of human communication.

Dr. Julie Buzby’s Life Lesson #3: Intuition matters.

I think they tried to beat all the intuition out of us in veterinary school, but thankfully, I had some hidden reserves that I was able to cultivate after graduation. Call it a sixth sense. Call it keen observation. Call it mother’s intuition. The point is that you know your dog better than anyone else on the planet. This is an incredible asset. When your gut says something is wrong, refer to Lesson #2.

Sometimes, as veterinarians, we don’t know where to put the information a client is providing into our Western veterinary matrix. But that doesn’t mean that it is not a valuable piece of the puzzle.

You know your dog. YOU are an esteemed member of your dog's healthcare team! ~Dr. Julie BuzbyClick To Tweet

Repeatedly, I hear these three themes. They all interrelate. They all run deep.

As a dog mom, have you struggled with mom guilt, kept quiet instead of speaking up, or ignored your intuition?

Leverage your experience to help others in our community by commenting below.

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Filed Under: Dr. Buzby's Love of Dogs Stories, Our Blog: The Buzby Bark

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Cynthia Lusk says

    August 19, 2018 at 12:03 am

    Thank you so much for all your helpful information especially about guilt. I really enjoyed this read.

    Reply
    • Julie Buzby says

      August 27, 2018 at 6:06 pm

      Thank you so much for your kind words, Cynthia. I appreciate you being a long-time friend of Team ToeGrips!

      Reply
  2. Joy says

    August 13, 2016 at 7:32 am

    Great post. I think for me the mom guilt is the hardest. I can do the other things but I always feel like I should have done just one more thing with my dog. There is just not enough time, energy or money to do it all and one needs to be satisfied with what we do do.

    Reply
  3. Vicki Gould says

    August 13, 2016 at 2:00 am

    I enjoy reading your informative blogs and watching your videos. I have had Mom guilt not only in the past with my two human children but also in the present with my 3 furbabies. You are definitely right about the intuition. We know them better than anyone and can tell when things are not right. We all just try and do what we think is the best for them and hope it all works out in the end. Thank you for all helpful good information. I look forward to seeing more.

    Reply
  4. Jeanne says

    August 12, 2016 at 9:28 am

    I also agree that owning a healthier dog equals a happy person. As a dog owner, it is our responsibilty to care and check our furry friend’s physical and mental well being. Pets, especially dogs are good sources of social and emotional support for everyone. It is their uncoditional love for us that makes us a happier person. And these life lessons you shared to us are great additional learning for us dog owners. I love your takeaway messages.. Thank You.

    Reply
    • Dr. Buzby says

      August 12, 2016 at 11:49 pm

      Thanks, Jeanne. I appreciate your comment. I couldn’t agree with you more! We humans are certainly blessed by the unconditional love of our dogs. We recently acquired a third dog, who showed up in our driveway and adopted us. I am amazed at how much love and joy our dogs bring to our family!

      Reply
  5. Alyssa says

    August 9, 2016 at 12:22 pm

    I struggle with “mom guilt” anytime I leave my dog at home when she’s not feeling well. I worry about her all day and wish I could be home with her. In most cases, if I were home, her treatment would be the same (medication and waiting).

    I continue to try to let go of this and do the best job I can at work so I can keep making the money we need to take care of her. I try to remind myself that whether I’m at home or at work, she knows I love her.

    Reply
    • Dr. Buzby says

      August 10, 2016 at 11:54 am

      Thanks, Alyssa. I think mom guilt is “standard issue” for all moms, but we must overcome. 🙂
      I love your comments. Thank you! Your love for your dog exudes from your pores! 🙂 Keep up the fantastic work!

      Reply
  6. Donna says

    August 9, 2016 at 11:59 am

    Dr. Julie,
    I feel as though you are speaking directly to me. After 45 yrs. of being a pet parent, I still have “guilt” over my younger day IN-experiences. Thank you for the ‘talk’. I’ll try to keep it in mnd as I witness my almost 19 yr. old boy living out his last days. He certainly is being a ‘Trooper’ and we could learn so much from him.

    Reply
    • Dr. Buzby says

      August 10, 2016 at 11:59 am

      Donna, You are one of the most proactive pet parents I’ve ever known! I’ve witnessed first-hand your relentless passion for your pets. You’ve certainly nailed lesson #2 and #3. Keep up the great work.

      Reply
  7. Sharon Crouse says

    August 9, 2016 at 10:12 am

    Love these life lessons… they apply to all our “children” – no matter their age. I appreciate the advice and reminders. (As well as this site and blog.) Thank you.

    Reply
    • Dr. Buzby says

      August 10, 2016 at 12:01 pm

      Thanks, Sharon! I am so happy to hear that you appreciate the tips, site, and blog. We appreciate YOU! 🙂 Thanks for taking the time to leave your comment!

      Reply

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About Dr. Buzby

Dr. Julie Buzby has been an integrative veterinarian for twenty years and has earned certification by the American Veterinary Chiropractic Association in 1998, and by the International Veterinary Acupuncture Society in 2002.
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Dr. Buzby’s Blog offers tips on how to give your dog the happiest life possible. The content is presented solely for informational purposes and may not be relied upon to replace face-to-face medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment by professional pet healthcare providers. [more]

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