How will you know when it’s time to euthanize your dog?
How will you know when it’s “the time” to euthanize your failing dog? If you’re facing this difficult decision or if you’ve had to say goodbye to your canine companion, my heart goes out to you.
Not long ago, our family had to make the difficult decision to say goodbye to our beloved dog, Luke. (For part one of the story of Luke’s cancer diagnosis and his passing, please read Saying Goodbye to Our Dog: Our Family’s Story of Our Last Days with Luke.) With raw honesty—my own recent experience weighing heavily on my heart—I’d like to share my thoughts with you.
I know the pain is stifling. May these reflections on my own experience with Luke help bring you peace and comfort.
5 heart-to-heart takeaways to help you know when it is “the time” for your failing dog:
1. It is always better to be too early rather than too late when making THE decision.
More times than I can count over my 20+ years as a veterinarian, I have found myself sitting on the floor with weeping clients who have come to me to euthanize their failing dog. And they ask, “Are we doing the right thing by letting our dog go today?” (This is particularly true for dog owners caring for elderly dogs.)
While I can’t tell them that 2:18 on Thursday afternoon is indeed the “right time,” I can reassure them that they are in the right window of time, validating their decision to let their dog go with peace and dignity.
My guiding principle in saying goodbye to Luke was not to eke out every last second of life together, but rather to spend every last second of life together that he could enjoy.
In reality, Luke probably could have “lived” another week or two. But he had a rapidly growing tumor in his chest which was affecting his attitude, appetite, and breathing. We didn’t want him to get to the point where he was struggling for air.
My daughter (who was Luke’s person), was very cognizant of this. In the days after Luke’s diagnosis with cancer, she repeatedly told me, “I don’t want to do what’s best for me. I want to do what’s best for my dog. I know he’s not happy. He has such a sadness to his face, and I don’t want to keep him alive for my sake.”
The veterinarian who came to our home to euthanize Luke commented, “You’re fortunate to know when it’s time. So many dog owners struggle with this decision and wait too long.”
We can’t change the past, but my wish for you, if you are wrestling with making THE decision for your beloved dog, is that you will never have to lament, “I waited too long.”
#2 As much as we all long for it, the odds are slim that our dogs will pass away peacefully in their sleep.
I don’t know the actual stats, but I can tell you that very few of my own clients have been given the gift of their faithful canine companion passing gently in the night.
For the vast majority of dog owners, we must be brave and selfless and give our dogs the final gift of a peaceful and painless passing through euthanasia.
After counseling many clients and through my own experience with Luke’s passing, my heartfelt advice is this: making THE decision will most likely be a part of the journey of life with a dog.
#3 Release some of the pressure by living in the moment and treasuring each day with your dog.
The big, looming question is, “How will I know when it’s time to say goodbye to my beloved dog?” I believe, to some extent, that focusing on this question adds additional pressure during an already difficult time. When you recognize that, due to old age or serious illness, your dog is on a downward trend and not recovering, you probably don’t have to plan the specific date and hour immediately. Rather, take it one day at a time and consider each additional day as a gift.
As I discussed Luke’s progressive failing with the veterinarian’s assistant, she shared, “When clients are struggling with THE decision, I advise them to put out two jars.” She tells them, “Every time your dog is having a great day, put a penny in that jar. But every time you think ‘My dog’s just not himself, and I’m concerned about his quality of life,’ then put a penny in the other jar. Watch the pennies in each jar add up. Pretty soon it’s very obvious.”
Keeping a dog health journal is another way to track your dog’s good days and bad days. It will help you objectively reflect back on your thoughts and observations over time.
Recently, my friends lost their beloved senior dog unexpectedly after an anesthetic procedure. The dog developed a secondary pneumonia. My friends went to visit their beloved dog in the ICU and made the decision, based on his poor prognosis, to euthanize. In Luke’s situation, we had a couple weeks to process his diagnosis. In the case of senior dogs, sometimes the goodbye can be very prolonged.
While each situation is different, I think this is wise counsel across the board:
- let information (not emotion) be your guide
- seek insight, advice, and support from your veterinarian
- when in doubt, please remember point #1.
#4 Talk openly about euthanasia before “THE time.”
If more than one person lives with your dog, I hope you can talk openly and have meaningful conversations about the possibility of euthanasia as the time approaches. I’ve witnessed many couples who tiptoe into the topic of dog euthansia during a veterinary appointment. It’s as if the subject is too painful to broach at home and brushing it under the rug will negate the reality.
However, I’ve also witnessed the sense of relief and strength that comes when a couple finally talks openly about euthanasia for their dog. I’ve seen the compassion and support that comes from dog owners talking and crying it out together. Also, if you have children, I encourage you to include them in age-appropriate discussions. Kids are amazingly resilient and intuitive. In my experience, trying to “protect” kids makes it more painful for them in the long run.
In our case, my daughter Abigail made the final decisions for Luke. He was her heart dog. However, Abigail and I talked about Luke’s well-being and health status daily, often multiple times a day. So it was my decision too. As the mom of eight children who all tenderly loved Luke, there were many questions. I tried to answer each one in a sensitive but honest way.
#5 Consider at-home euthanasia for your dog
There’s no place like home. Dorothy had it right. And it’s especially true when it comes to euthanasia.
Euthanasia should be a reverent time, scripted the way you want it. Veterinary hospitals are busy, loud places. With home euthanasia, your dog’s last moments can be in the comfortable, stress-free environment of his or her home, and you can grieve in privacy.
Resources for at-home euthanasia
If you are searching for resources about at-home euthanasia or end of life care for your dog, I strongly endorse and adore Lap of Love veterinary hospice and home euthanasia service. It is a network of veterinarians from around the country who are dedicated to end-of-life care, including in-home euthanasia. You can find more information along with a directory of veterinarians in your area at Lap of Love. Also, Home to Heaven—one of the world’s first animal hospice services—offers a map of in-home pet euthanasia providers nationwide on their website.
I’ve heard many people say, “I could never be a veterinarian because I could never put a dog to sleep.” Well, I don’t want to say it’s my favorite part of the job, but I can tell you I’ve seen the value, for my clients and for my patients. Therefore, it’s my privilege and my honor to be able to help pets transition at the end of their lives.
A dog’s love lives on
I’ve read studies claiming that it’s harder for people to lose their pets than human loved ones. I’m sure that’s not true for us all, but one thing dogs have over humans is this: Dogs embody unconditional love, forgiveness, and joy.
I think a dog is a little reflector of God himself on this earth.
I am struggling with our decision to put our dog to rest on Friday. He is 19, has debilitating arthritis in his front legs and very weak back legs. He has also developed a dry cough that I’ve been told may be a result of heart failure. My husband is desperate for our pup to live his days with dignity. I’ve had to put other pets to rest in the past but they have been both old but also clearly ill, so the decision was a little bit easier. I’m most concerned that we are making the decision for us more than for him. He is still eating, though not as much. He is still wagging his tail, but not as happily. He is still getting around, but not without assistance.
Are we making this decision because it’s too much for us emotionally? Or are we making it because none of his ailments will improve and he is in need of our help?
I appreciate your comment about it always being better to do it earlier rather than later. That rings very clearly for me. But is it too early?
Dear Cathy,
I am sorry you are facing this difficult decision for your beloved boy. I understand your worry about making this choice too soon. It is ok to let go before all joy is lost and the only thing that remains is pain. If you wait too long, you may end up without the option to choose a peaceful passing for him. I will attach links to other articles with more information and great advice from other readers as well. Praying for clarity and strength. Bless you all. ♥
1. Using a Quality of Life Scale for Dogs
2. When to Euthanize a Dog With Arthritis: A Vet’s Heartfelt Advice
3. Dog Euthanasia: Knowing When to Say Goodbye
4. Preparing for Your Dog’s Euthanasia: 10 Thoughts for Peace
Out 19 year old shih tzu who is deaf, dementia and has one eye has developed weakness in his hind quarters. The vet put him on anti-inflammatory, muscle relaxer. When he is in the house he cries and we have to carry him outside/inside, to his food and water and back to the family room. When he gets up he sort drags his hind quarters then stands and the back legs ends up sitting. His vitals are all good and he eats, pees etc. I struggle since he seems miserable but he eats etc is it time to let him go? 🥲
Dear Kathy,
I am sorry your senior guy is struggling and understand your concern for his well-being. From what you describe, it does sound like his health has diminished. While he is still eating well, I am not sure that the willingness to eat equals a good quality of life. Would you say he is truly living or merely existing? Is he resting well and enjoying his daily routine? Does he still seek attention from his favorite people? I will attach links to other articles with more information and advice on how to make this emotional decision. Wishing you strength and comfort as you navigate this difficult path. Bless you both. ♥
1. Using a Quality of Life Scale for Dogs
2. Dementia in Dogs: When to Euthanize Your Beloved Senior Dog
3. Dog Euthanasia: Knowing When to Say Goodbye
4. Preparing for Your Dog’s Euthanasia: 10 Thoughts for Peace
Thank you for this post; it’s helped greatly in reassuring myself that I’m doing the right thing.
I have an 11-year-old mix named Henna. Last year, she was diagnosed with a nasal tumour because her nasal discharge started showing a little blood. In the previous two weeks, it’s worsened, and she’s bleeding more frequently, sneezing, rubbing her face and isn’t sleeping at night. She’s fixated with food, so I know I can’t gauge her quality of life on whether or not she’s eating.
So, I called my vet and asked for reassurance because this decision can be so challenging. He said that her nasal tumour was more than likely painful and I was doing the right thing. So, the vet is doing an at-home euthanasia on Tuesday. I would rather her go out on a higher note surrounded by people she loves – than risk her having a deadly bleed one of these nights and be too late.
Dear Amy,
My heart goes out to you with your loss of Henna. Your decision to say goodbye was a selfless act of love and might have been the only way to offer your girl freedom from suffering. I hope her passing was smooth and peaceful. Wishing you comfort for your heart and may Henna’s memory stay with you always. ♥
It is always difficult to know what to do when your dog is nearing the end. My friend and companion, Rufus, is at that stage now. He has end stage kidney disease, and has been intermittently vomiting and not eating. Some times you get hope when they rally for a short while, but I have had enough dogs to know when the time has come. I hope you all get the strength to make your own choices wisely, and with the best interests of your beloved pet and family in mind. I will be making arrangements for Rufus this week, knowing that he has had a full 14 years of life, and has had a great time. He is loyal and a great guard dog. I will miss him greatly, and have already shed tears for him. He will always be remembered, and they are always unique and one of a kind. Good luck all, do what you know is right, when it is right. Only you can come to that decision. Best
Dear Simon,
I am sorry you had to say goodbye to Rufus. I can only imagine how much you miss him but am certain he knew that he was dearly loved. Thank you for sharing your heart with us and for offering empathy and support to others. Praying for peace and comfort as you continue life’s journey and wishing you brighter days ahead.
Hello Laura
We have a 12 year old miniature long haired dachshund. Bert has portosystemic liver shunts which were inoperable so we managed with medication and special diet. At about 8 he started having seizures so we added another medication. After a year or so I tried modifying his diet slightly to remove even more purines. At about 10.5 his seizures stopped. We don’t know why but we were grateful. Unfortunately he hurt his back and couldn’t walk. We took him to therapy and he can walk and doesn’t seem to be in much pain. He is wobbly and lacks strength in his back legs still. In this last year we noticed him getting stuck, circling and lost and eliminating without warning. He has no interest in play at all but still gets quite excited for food. He doesn’t see much and doesn’t respond to his name (although as a dachshund that was never his strength). He’s not aggressive but I am the only one who still gets kisses. He will still settle with us and frequently will sleep on my partner’s chest or my lap in the evenings. We are agonising about when is the right time to let him go. Are we keeping him alive for him or us? Every day we discuss this. We’ve spent thousands with our vets. I say this so you understand we’ve always consulted the professionals. He’s not in pain but doesn’t play. He still will sniff around out and about but doesn’t “walk” anymore. Some weeks we get the timing just right and have no soiling in the house but it can be daily or multiple times daily. I just want to do the right thing for him. He still is my most beautiful beloved boy.
Dear Lucinda,
I am sorry Bert is dealing with so many issues at once and his quality of life has declined. Many of the new problems you describe sound like symptoms of dementia (canine cognitive dysfunction). When a senior dog is nearing the end of their life, they enter a window of time when saying goodbye can be a loving option even if it isn’t urgent. It sounds like Bert may have entered his window. It is ok to let go before all joy is lost and the only thing that remains is pain and anxiety. I will attach links to other articles with more information and great advice from other readers. Wishing you peace and comfort as you navigate this difficult path. Bless you and your sweet boy.
1. Using a Quality of Life Scale for Dogs
2. Dementia in Dogs: When to Euthanize Your Beloved Senior Dog
3. Dog Euthanasia: Knowing When to Say Goodbye
4. Preparing for Your Dog’s Euthanasia: 10 Thoughts for Peace
I have made the decision to put my pug and lifelong best friend, Tulip to rest. She is scheduled to peacefully cross the rainbow bridge this afternoon with the help of an at-home veterinary service. She is nearly 18 years old. Just last week I was telling myself she could easily live another year or so. I was so optimistic about her longevity. However, just a few days later, a thought occurred to me… is that a selfish way to think?
Tulip entered my family when I was just 7 years old. I took her under my permanent care after my mother was diagnosed with dementia and went into a nursing home. She has been hard of hearing and vision for a few years now, as expected with a dog her age. Last year she was treated for pneumonia, which worsened her breathing problems and also left her with clear signs of dementia and vestibular challenges on occasion. She began walking in tighter circles, getting stuck in more corners and leaning to one side more than the other. A few months ago my vet had noticed a heart murmur, at which point her symptoms began to get worse. She started having many more accidents in the house, often missing the potty training pads I left out for her. In recent weeks, she has not only been pooping in the house, but circles in it, so that the mess travels all around the house and on to her. Diapers were a failed attempt to make my life easier while ignoring the real issue. I became exhausted by having to clean up such a huge mess every time I came home and I hated resenting her for something she didn’t choose either.
Finally, on Friday I came home from work and cried out to God for the answer. It came to me promptly. No potty trained, happy, healthy dog would be walking in their own mess all day voluntarily. On top of that, I can’t imagine the anxiety she feels being trapped in a corner, or spinning in circles all day. I knew it was time to let go.
I am heartbroken. We grew up together. I don’t know what life is like without her. She helped my mom fight her illness, and helped me overcome mine. In many ways, she is the last part of my mom that I have with me each day. She is the last part of my childhood I must now let go of.
I know she fought for so many years for us, giving all of herself when we needed her most. I must be strong for her today and set her free. May she rest easy, my beloved Tulip. My beautiful little flower (10/15/07) – (07/29/24)
Dear Anna,
My heart is broken for you as you grieve the loss of Tulip. I know this was the most difficult decision to make, but it was a selfless act of love. I am glad you were with Tulip every step of the way and am certain she knew how much she meant to you. May her memory stay with you always and continue to be a blessing in your life. Praying for healing for your heart and wishing you brighter days ahead. ♥
My Yuni is going through the same thing your Tulip went through. She’ll be 19 this October. I’ve been fighting my vets suggestions 6 months ago of putting some thought into her “end of life.” She’s crying every night now because she can’t get comfortable. I have her in a cage area so that she can always find her bed to get some rest while I go to work or else she’ll just circle the house for hours on end. These last few weeks she’s been peeing and pooping in the house more often and doing the same thing as Tulip did… she walked into her poop and just falls on it—she’s a very clean girl and I know she hates it! The thing that’s holding me back from being confident in my decision of letting her cross the rainbow bridge is that… Yuni still eats and drinks as though she enjoys it. I know she’s not going to get better… and I know I am being selfish by prolonging it. I was really hoping she was going to meet her younger brother here in December but I think after reading about Tulip…I need to be strong and think about her. Thank you for sharing your story.
Dear Jenn,
I am sorry you are facing this difficult decision for Yuni. With all the issues she is facing daily (confusion, anxiety, distress, lack of rest, incontinence, etc.) I am not sure a willingness to eat is giving her a good quality of life. I would rather let go one day too early than one day too late and allow unnecessary suffering. Sometimes the most loving option is to offer peace and rest. I hope you will be able to find the advice you need to make the best choice for you and your sweet girl. Wishing you strength and comfort as you navigate this emotional path. Bless you both.
hi, Jenn. I’m just sitting here bawling my eyes out about your story with your Yuni and the prior story of Anna and her Tulip. Our story is practically identical with our 16 yo Finnegan. His litter mate bro and sister cat both died naturally in their sleep, which I was praying would happen for Finn as this decision is impossible, isn’t it? Finn is doing what Tulip and Yuni are doing. Wondered where you are in your journey with your decision? I feel we need to make this decision this week or two. Everything I’m reading makes sense but the sadness and guilt is overwhelming me….I hope for you great peace, you and Yuni and Anna and Tulip. Thank you for sharing your stories.
Dear Janine,
My heart aches for you as you face this emotional decision for Finnegan. Praying for clarity and strength as you navigate this difficult path. Bless you and your sweet boy. ♥
Ms. Anna,
Good evening. Sitting here tonight 11:44 pm, just finished reading your story about Tulup and my heart goes to you. I am at that point thinking of our Bella, she is 18 years old Cocker Spaniel. We are actually going through the same experience like what you had. Bella is now blind, deaf and having so much difficulty in walking, standing and so painful to see her scratch herself trying to relieve the pain of arthritis.
As you mentioned, Bella also poop everywhere making circles and missing her pad, and trying to find her way to get back to her bed. So painful to watch her struggles. I still do not know what to do whether to give her up or hoping she will have a good day.
I will try to visit the vet tomorrow or the day after to seek help. I want to see her happy and don’t want to see her in pain. Yet, it is hard to think of letting her go.
Dear Russell,
My heart aches for you as you face this emotional decision for Bella. I know you want to give her every chance possible but sometimes letting go is the most loving option. I hope your visit with the vet will give you the answers you need. Praying for clarity and peace. Bless you and your sweet girl.
Hi. I have a 16 1/2 golden mix named Ginger. I have had her since she was a puppy and she is also my 1st dog. Ginger has arthritis and is prescribed Gapopentin although it makes her very tired and thirsty. She recently started to have problems with her back legs to the point where she is sort of dragging them and sometimes she struggles to get her back feet to lay flat so she’ll be walking on her knuckles per say and she’ll eventually fall down. She does have a benign tumor that I believe is also weighing her back end down. Her spine is curved and she is also very thin. I have to carry her everywhere including to go potty which I have a sling for her to help her walk. I am spoon feeding her as well holding her up to drink. Sometimes she yelps if I’m not in the same room but I’m not sure if it’s because she can’t see me or she is in pain. I believe she has dementia and possibly deaf now. I’m not sure how her eye sight is. I know she is struggling and I know it’s time for her to cross rainbow bridge but I am personally having a hard time accepting that. My mental health is deteriorating. My family is telling me it’s time for Ginger and I know that but I am struggling to come to those terms. I don’t know who to talk to about how I’m feeling.
Dear Marlee,
My heart aches for you as you face this difficult decision for Ginger. It is clear she is a big part of your life, and I am certain she knows how much you love her. I encourage you to look for a support group in your area, talk to a therapist, or try one of the many pet bereavement groups online. No one should have to go through this alone. Saying goodbye to a beloved pup may break your heart, but it might be the only way to offer your girl the peace and rest she deserves. I would rather let go one day too early than one day too late and allow unnecessary suffering. Praying for your strength as you navigate this emotional path. Bless you and Ginger. ♥
I am definitely struggling to know if it is time for my ~16yo chihuahuas. I adopted Fiona 7 years ago as an elderly, one-eyed, but spunky lady. She did so well until about 2.5 years ago, when her vision in her remaining eye began to go along with her hearing. She is now blind and deaf, has CHF, and is very arthritic. She has to be carried literally everywhere…to her food…to drink, to go potty…to bed. She has accidents constantly if I’m not paying attention. She has a halo device that keeps her from walking into walls if she’s up, but she basically sleeps all day. She is unable to play or do really much of anything. I keep thinking that I will know when it’s too much. She takes so many meds, and one for arthritis, but I just can’t tell if she is in pain. That seems to be what I am waiting for. Like, if I knew she was in pain, then I would feel ok about deciding to let her go. The way she walks though, looks so painful and difficult, but she doesn’t cry or wince. I just don’t know.
Dear Angie,
I am sorry Fiona is struggling and I understand your concern. From what you describe it sounds like she is dealing with pain, incontinence, lethargy, confusion, and lack of interest in her favorite things each day. I know you mentioned she is not crying out in pain, but that is not common for dogs. Dogs are great at masking pain symptoms and can seem fairly normal even with extreme discomfort. I am worried her quality of life may need to be evaluated. You can ask your vet for their honest assessment. Would you say your girl is truly living or merely existing? It is ok to let go before all joy is lost and the only thing that remains is pain. I would rather say goodbye one day too early than one day too late and allow unnecessary suffering. I will attach links to other articles with more information. Hoping you can find the answers you need to make the best choices for you and your sweet girl. Bless you and Fiona. ♥
1. Using a Quality of Life Scale for Dogs
2. When to Euthanize a Dog With Arthritis: A Vet’s Heartfelt Advice
3. Preparing for Your Dog’s Euthanasia: 10 Thoughts for Peace
I have had two experiences of euthanasia. The first with my springer kye who after a short illness was found to have thoracic hemangiosarcoma which had spread to his liver and spleen. That goodbye was hard because you would never tell how poorly he was he was still so playful but we knew that inevitably he could have had a traumatic passing if not. My elder dog Kafka then went downhill after kye went. I believe he grieved so much. He started to develop ulcers and didn’t walk as happily as he used to. His dementia worsened and his eyes were dull. He was on my lap at home and when the vet went to give him the sedation he sat up and looked at me directly. I don’t know what that meant – if it meant I was doing the wrong thing. I struggle daily with the loss and my last memories. I try to remember them as they were at their best. It’s a long and hard process because since they left my life has never been the same.
Dear Laura,
My heart aches for you with all the loss you have endured. I can only imagine how much you miss Kye and Kafka, but am certain they knew how much they were loved. You made the ultimate sacrifice to allow your own heart to break so that your beloved pups didn’t have to needlessly suffer. Thank you for being willing to share your experience with us. Praying for peace and comfort as you continue life’s journey. Wishing you brighter days ahead. ♥
Dexter is a Shorkie approximately 16 years old. His veterinarian feels certain he has a brain tumor on the right side of his brain. He sleeps most of the day and night but when he’s awake he mostly is confused and walks in a counterclockwise tight circle bumping into things. He has started going potty inside the house which is very unusual for him. I carry him a lot to get him to where he needs to go, the water dish, his food, outside to potty, back to bed. He weighs about 23 lbs. He has a great appetite and drinks water like normal, but he doesn’t seem normal mentally.
My wife and I are brokenhearted because we think it may be time to let him go. We would appreciate any words of wisdom. We don’t want to wait until he is having seizures or any other negative symptoms but want to ensure we are making the right decision to let him go.
Dear Dwayne,
I am sorry Dexter is struggling and experiencing these worrisome neurological issues. I agree with your vet that this sounds like a brain tumor. It is ok to let go before all joy is lost and the only thing that remains is pain. I would rather say goodbye one day too early than one day too late and allow unnecessary suffering. I cannot think of a greater act of selfless love than to allow your own heart to break so that your sweet boy can find peace and rest. Praying for your strength and comfort as you navigate this emotional path. Bless you and Dexter.
Our adorable magical little toy Schnauzer Hanz has gone completely blind and deaf. He doesn’t make a mess In the house if we are around to hear him whine and we keep a tight schedule. He can’t be left alone because the only solace he finds is being held tightly in your arms and specifically in the arms of his girl, my daughter who has been his girl for 16 years. He likes me, his mom, but doesn’t relax as well with me. The blindness and I believe dimentia causes him to walk in circles until he gets so dizzy he falls. He spends his days in the car while my daughter works and visits him on her breaks. He eats if it is put right in front of him and drinks if you add some bone broth so he can smell it. He recently had a bout of bloody stools and vomitting to dehydration. His blood work came back normal and he was put on anti nausea meds.
He sleeps all day and when awake he has too much nervous energy so he circles until he tires. He cannot do any of his many commands and tricks and he cannot run….He used to be super sonic. He cries like a baby when he feels abandoned.
The quality of life questions hasn’t really helped me to know what is best for him. I think he is happy if he is in my grown daughters arms all the time but that just isn’t possible with a real life. The vet says he’s healthy in body but he has teeth issues which makes his lymph glands swollen and some arthritis. The thought of euthanasia is a real trigger for me from my history with animals and having to make that decision for animals on our working farm when they could no longer be of service.
I feel so selfish and horrible thinking that the decision to end his life would mean making my life easier.
I am watching him right now just circling and bumping into things because I am not holding him while I type this letter.
He has been such a gift to our family, he came into our lives when we needed some love and he has been a true vessel of joy and happiness. This is the first animal I have had in many years just because of this ultimate end! I swore never to get close to animal again because I couldn’t handle the pain of loss.
Believe me now when I say it’s the best and worst thing to love so much.
I know ultimately it is a choice for the best for him and our family but I sure hate being the one.
Dear Heidi,
My heart aches for you as you face this emotional decision for Hanz. It is incredibly hard to think about quality of life when most of the issues are mental instead of physical. I do think mental disease causes just as much suffering, if not more, than physical disease. From what you describe, Hanz’s days are filled with confusion, separation anxiety, lethargy, stress, and he no longer finds joy in the things he used to (other than your daughter). Sometimes saying goodbye is the most loving option and only way to offer a beloved pup freedom and peace. We often focus so much on giving our dogs a good life that we forget a peaceful goodbye is just as important. I can’t think of a bigger act of selfless love than to allow your own heart to break so that your boy can finally be at rest. It is ok to let go before all joy is lost and the only thing that remains is pain and suffering. I will attach links to other articles with more information. I hope you can find the advice you need to navigate this tough road ahead. Praying for your strength and wishing you brighter days ahead. ♥
1. Using a Quality of Life Scale for Dogs
2. Dementia in Dogs: When to Euthanize Your Beloved Senior Dog
3. Preparing for Your Dog’s Euthanasia: 10 Thoughts for Peace
My 15 year old Terrier mix has dementia (about 2 years?). She sleeps most days. Her sundowner syndrome is severe. She gets Trazadone and will usually sleep about 5 hours. Once she is up and anxious, usually around 3am, she lets me know by standing on me and sometimes pawing at my face (ouch)! When I let her out she often doesn’t want to come back in but it’s too cold to stay outside so I have to chase her down. She wears a diaper at night otherwise she’ll leave a puddle inside on the tile. If we don’t see it and step in it we slip, injuries have occurred. physically she’s doing ok, hearing diminished and fear of “loud” noises or sudden movement. I could go on… How do you know when it’s “time” when it’s a mental decline rather than physical?
Dear Eselce,
My heart goes out to you as you navigate this difficult path. Trying to evaluate quality of life when dealing with mental disease is SO HARD. I will attach links to other articles with more information on this exact topic. There are also great comments and advice from other readers at the bottom of each article. Hoping you can find the answers you need to feel confident in your decisions. Praying for clarity and comfort. Bless you and your sweet girl.
1. Using a Quality of Life Scale for Dogs
2. Dementia in Dogs: When to Euthanize Your Beloved Senior Dog
3. Preparing for Your Dog’s Euthanasia: 10 Thoughts for Peace
i have a 16.5 yr old Aussie Duddle. Until 2 weeks ago, she was in perfect health, running, walking, eating, etc. She then suffered 2 seizures which ended up triggering dementia.
She still goes for walks, eats, and has not shown any aggresive behaivior. However, she seems disoriented at times and has trouble sleeping (wanders around). We are giving her antianxiety medication.
When would be the time to euthanize her?
Dear Natan,
I am sorry your senior girl’s health is declining and you are facing some difficult decisions in the near future. Deciding when the time is right can be so hard. I always think it is better to say goodbye one day too early rather than one day too late and allow unnecessary suffering. I will attach links to other articles with more information and great advice from other readers. Ultimately, you have to trust your intuition as you know your pup better than anyone. I hope you can find the answers you need to navigate this emotional path with confidence. Wishing you and your girl comfort and peace.
1. Using a Quality of Life Scale for Dogs
2. Dementia in Dogs: When to Euthanize Your Beloved Senior Dog
3. Preparing for Your Dog’s Euthanasia: 10 Thoughts for Peace
Yesterday, my gorgeous almost 15 year old Cocker Spaniel, Dante crossed the rainbow, but the guilt of have euthanized him too late is killing me.
Dante is my 1st dog, didnt know much about dogs before him and he have been a huge part of my life since I got him.
Dante was diagnosed with low grade soft tissue sarcoma outside his mouth on May 2023. Since then he had 3 surgeries and 1 electrochemo but didnt work and no more surgeries were done since August 2023 because of his age and tumor location and because it has metastasize to the neck lymph node. All his other organs were clear.
I did all in my power to give him a good life and tried to get rid of the cancer when I was told was still possible.
But at the beginning of February 2024 he started to have problems with his legs. He woke up one day panting and not wanting to walk. He was given meds for the pain and he was back to normal until last Saturday. That day he vomit, didn’t want to eat much, didn’t want to go on his walks and the tumor outside his mouth grew and started to smell and the lymph node was huge. The vet told me to start thinking on euthanasia and i felt not ready, I have never done that before and it felt so unnatural to do this when all his life I did everything to protect Dante and preserve his life.
After seeing him the following days, so fraile, having a hard tine to lie down, eating less and less I finally made the hardest decision and made the appt.
The morning we had the appt he woke up very ill. The lymph node now look like a big lump on his neck and he was panting a lot, he vomit or spitted and look unsteady when he walked.
I layed on the floor with him and he put his head on my lap, we cuddled and I hugged him, sang to him, while I cried waiting for the appt, he started to close his eyes but kept waking up, even stood up. When we got to the vet, we carried him and the dr said he had neurological problem and the mass has invaded his mouth. I didn’t see this before as he wouldnt let anyone touch him there.
Euthanasia was done, he was surrounded by me and my husband, with his teddy and a letter I wrote for him.
The pain and guilt I feel is unmeasurable when I think I should have known better and saw the signs.
The fact that he might felt pain until we got to the vet and that I caused it for being ignorant is killing me.
I just hope wherever he is he can forgive him.
I never thought this could happen so fast and never never wanted him to suffer. My heart is in pieces, I miss him a lot. He has taken a big part of my heart with him.
Dear Ikky,
My heart aches for you with your recent loss of Dante. It is normal to ponder all the “what ifs” but please don’t continue to carry the burden of guilt over how things progressed. You did what you could to give your boy a wonderful life. I am certain he knew how much he was loved and that your presence was a comfort even in his final moments. I hope with time the grief will fade and your heart will begin to heal. May Dante’s memory stay with you always and continue to be a blessing in your life. ♥
I need help to think through and decide if it’s time to put my 14 year old miniature schnauzer to sleep. He is struggling with multiple health issues, he has pancreatitis since he was 9 years old (treated when symptoms show up , as needed) , liver disease (no treatment needed) and gal bladder issues (is on Urodisol) and was recently diagnosed with diabetes. He is on 2 times a day Vetsulin and his sugar levels continue to be high after weeks of Vetsulin, and increasing does over time to 4.5ML after each meal.
He is also blind (left eye is fully blind and right has some vision but can’t see in dark), can’t hear well but that has not terribly affected his quality of life. Things that are affecting his quality of life are:
1. He doesn’t sleep comfortably most of the times. I have shown my vet the pictures of him sleeping and he also said that he is in pain. We have tried pain medications and it sometimes helps but not always
2. He is always hungry and thristy but can’t eat or drink a lot. Meaning, if he eats more than half cup per meal he starts throwing up, will have cramps and needs to be treated with pancreatitis meds. If he drinks a lot he ends up peeing a lot.
3. He bed wets every night and yes, I mean unconsciously pees in the bed during nights. He doesn’t like to take shower everyday, so get shower once a week
4. He can’t control his potty during the day, and doesn’t like it when he goes inside the house. He tries to close it, hide it and get it all over his body
5. He goes poo poo more often and tries to either eat it or push it down with his feet or body, gets it all over his body
6. If I delay (not miss) his feed and Vetsulin by 1-2 hours his urination immediately increases to 2-3 times an hour
7. He is mostly asleep. When he wakes up he is disoriented and doesn’t walk straight
8. When he uses stairs, he slips and falls 1 in 4 times
9. He isn’t interested in walks, he finishes his business and looks to head back home.
10. He was sent back from grooming due to excessive urination and pooping. We tried grooming at different time and the groomer said he did okay but was not comfortably standing for even short periods, like 2-3 mins.
Given his age and complex disease conditions what prognosis can I expect with Insulin/Vetsulin and other treatments he is on? I cannot see him struggle so much and wondering if there is any better treatment options for him. If not, is there anything else I need to think about from a quality of life perspective. The thought of putting him to sleep keeps coming to mind as I can’t see him struggling and go through so much. I am mentally, emotionally prepared for it as well but don’t know if I need to take that big step. Unfortunately, unlike life threatening diseases this is more of cumulative impact of multiple disease conditions and I am struggling to figure out what is right for him and looking for help. PLEASE HELP
Dear Abijit,
My heart goes out to you with all you are dealing with. It sounds like your poor boy is really struggling. With all the different diseases and conditions your dog is facing, I am not sure it will be possible to get the diabetes well regulated. I know you want to do what is best for your beloved pup and honestly, saying goodbye may be the most loving option. I would rather let go one day too early than one day too late and allow unnecessary suffering. I will attach links to other articles with more information and great advice from other readers. Hoping you can find the answers you need to make a decision that is best for you and your sweet boy. Wishing you strength and comfort as you navigate this emotional path ahead. Bless you. ♥
1. Using a Quality of Life Scale for Dogs
2. Dog Euthanasia: Knowing When to Say Goodbye
3. Preparing for Your Dog’s Euthanasia: 10 Thoughts for Peace
Thank you for writing this article Dr. Buzby. My best girl Jazmine who just turned 15yrs on 1/23 has been suffering from Grand May seizures. It is the worst experience for both myself and Jasmine. In the last fours years her health has declined, she’s had her left eye removed, has collapsed trachea and just in the last year has been having seizures. It pains me to even think about sending her over the rainbow bridge but as I watch her day by day, I see her struggling but the fact that she still has a good appetite and begs for food makes me feel like she still wants to live. I want her to have a good quality of life but should the seizures continue and happen more frequently, I’ll talk to our vet to make sure she’s not suffering and make the decision then. I love my Jas so much and it hurts me to think about having to let her go but I don’t want her suffering. It’s not easy 🙁
Dear Melissa,
I am sorry your beloved girl, Jazmine, is nearing the end of her days, and her health is declining. I think it is good you are paying such close attention to her quality of life and plan to ensure she does not have to needlessly suffer. Thank you for sharing your story with our readers. It brings comfort to others to know they are not alone. Wishing you strength and peace as you continue to navigate this difficult path. Bless you and your sweet girl.
Magic, my best buddy, my heart, my love had been limping for months but otherwise was ok.
On Oct 23rd 2023, blood work was perfect. Xrays showed a dark spot in one of the bones of his wrist. Suspected as cancer.
He is a big beautiful black Shepard/Retriever/ Rottweiler mix. He weighs 34 kgs (~70 lbs) but his usual weight is 40 kg (~ 82 lbs). He is 12 years old, more or less. I rescued him from the streets as a young, starving, and aggressive dog that no one wanted (lots of them where I live). We trained together for about a year and his transformation was beautiful. He became a socially acceptable but protective dog when needed. He and I have a special bond. He has 3 other rescues as his family.
Recently a friend gave me her dog’s splints, which eased his limping somewhat.
At the follow up vet appt Jan 10th, the xrays showed larger dark spots in the bones and MORE of them in other bones😱. No no no. Not my Magic !!! The vet and I discussed the options for him. Amputation which seems like mutilation, AND how would my Magic adapt as he old and big.? Plus he has had the surgery for hip dysplasia. So we put him on prednisone for 5 days to reduce swelling and then begin Chemotherapy next week
He was walking strong and handsome again after starting the prednisone. I had hope for the chemotherapy.
But today today he is dramatically worse. His leg is completely non-weight bearing. He holds his whole leg up in front of him. He didn’t want to walk, which he loves. Eating is no problem.
So now I am at the crux of the decision to carry on with the plan we made only 4 days ago, or let him go. This sudden downturn of mobility is nagging at my brain and my heart.
As I am alone in this decision, the articles and their ideas of pennies in a jar for good days bad days, and others help but it makes me cry.
The truth becomes clear. How do I decide to let go of my best friend, my hero?
The one I call “My Handsome Man”. I have done it in the past and the pain and guilt are more than I can bear.
Dear Judi,
My heart aches for you as you face this emotional decision for Magic. It is clear he is dearly loved, and I know you want to do what is best for him. I wish I could tell you how to proceed and knew what the outcome would be of each possible path. In these circumstances, you have to go with your intuition. You know Magic better than anyone. I am sorry there is no simple solution, and each option comes with its own price. I will be keeping you in my thoughts and praying for your strength and clarity. Wishing your sweet boy peace and comfort. Bless you both. ♥
Dr Buzby,
Thank you for all the articles on making these very difficult decisions. They have helped us prepare for tomorrow when will “set our sweet Lilly free” at home with the hospice team. Two years ago our sweet 12 year old maltipoo, Lilly, suddenly had difficulty breathing. A quick trip to the ER vet revealed heart failure. The shock of the diagnosis, list of treatment options coupled with the cost of care estimates was overwhelming. We decided to give her 48 hours of care to see if she would rebound. It all happened so quickly and we weren’t ready to let her go. She was discharged and then treated for kidney failure with weekly SQ injections and 3 medicines 3x a day, we had to compound to administer. She recovered and medicines reduced to twice daily. We don’t regret the decision and find joy in the two years she gave us.
Two months ago we began to see signs of decline, including dementia and inactivity, weakness in hips, then loss of appetite. This week we learned she is in renal failure. We could repeat the hospital intravenous infusion therapy and a month of SQ injections twice a week to give her a few more weeks or months but told it will not reverse her gradual decline. So we have elected to have at-home euthanasia tomorrow. Our hearts are heavy and memories of better days flowing but know we cannot bring her back to those better days. I’m trying to be strong while honoring her sweet unconditional love and faithfulness through the 14 1/2 years she has given us. Your article gives me hope we will be able to do this and rejoice in setting her free.
Dear Deb,
I am so sorry for your loss of Lilly. I think your choice of in-home euthanasia offers the most comfort and I hope it was a peaceful experience for everyone involved. May Lilly’s memory be a blessing in your life. Wishing you brighter days ahead as you continue life’s journey.
I have a German Shepherd/border collie mix who will be 16 in October. Her name is Vixen.
Vixen was officially diagnosed with dementia about a year ago but I’d say it started almost 2 years ago with just small signs I didn’t clue into right away.
Currently struggling to figure out if she has a good quality of life.
she used to be soo active and playful. She was even still hiking with me happily at 13 years of age. Over the past few years I’ve notice a very fast decline in her activity levels. She no longer plays with toys or with my other dog. In the past 6 months I’ve noticed she’ll go for short walks but doesn’t actually seem like she wants to be out there walking, even though she gladly lets me leash her up, she just doesn’t seem to want to be out once we get moving.
We used to sit outside all the time and now she never wants to sit outside with me.
She is happy to see me when I get home, and will take some affection. Generally though, she doesn’t enjoy too much petting anymore like she used to.
She has been on Selegeline for almost a year now and it’s made a huge difference in her sleeping patterns. She does sleep through the night now where she wouldn’t before. She would be up all night pacing and nothing I did would settle her. Now she will sleep at night but I am starting to get more pacing episodes during the day, recently.
I’m just not sure she’s really happy anymore… but she’s otherwise very healthy with great blood work results as well.. loves her food, drinks, always pees outside and poops outside with just an occasional accident.
I just don’t what to keep her around if there’s nothing left for her in life. I don’t see that she has much joy in things anymore, other than me coming home and her feeding times. She won’t even sit with me on the floor anymore and will often walk away if I try to just sit and relax with her. Don’t even get me started with nail trims and regular grooming. It used to be a breeze for me to do them.. now she bites and fights if I try to do anything.
I just don’t know what the right thing is for her.. I’ve been reading lots of things and it’s so hard to figure out the right decision. I just want her to be happy again..
Dear Nicole,
I am so sorry you were in this difficult situation with Vixen. Making the choice to say goodbye is heartbreaking but often the only way to give a beloved dog freedom and peace. I hope you were able to find the answers you needed to make the best decision for everyone involved. My heart goes out to you, and I wish you the best as you continue life’s journey.
Hi, thank you for writing this article. I euthanized my 11 year old dog this morning. A doctor came to our home. He had arthritis that we had been treating with pain meds for the past three years. In December 2021, he screamed and fell to the floor. His vet took X-rays. It showed arthritis in his spine with bone chards touching the spinal cord. He was put on a cocktail of three meds. It worked until last month when he screamed in pain and fell to the floor. His vet added another med. I had a conversation with the doc at that time about when to say goodbye to Marvin. He was very supportive and said it’s best to not let him experience any more pain. It’s okay to let him go on a good day. While intellectually I’ve always believed that, it was still the hardest decision I’ve had to make. I’m devastated! I’m so worried that I gave up too soon. Everyone keeps telling me that he’s so young. I miss my boy. I feel like a part of me has been torn away.
Dear Jeannie,
I am so sorry for your loss of Marvin. It sounds like you did so much to help him and keep him comfortable the past three years but that you made the right decision about letting him go before he was in too much pain. I hope you can find some peace and comfort during this difficult time. ♥
My almost 13 yo Tyson (his DNA said he was mostly am staff and some boxer) was diagnosed with hermangiosarcoma of the liver in mid June. after on and off days of not eating and lethargy (we thought at first it was his back acting up) again). The vet suggested Yunnan Baiyou and Hill’s ONC food and he seemed to be doing pretty good. He was quiet yesterday but seemed comfortable and went for short walk but late in the afternoon he became restless and unsteady on his feet and starting panting. I have been reading everything I can over the past few weeks and knew he must be bleeding internally. . When he first seemed uncomfortable I called the vet and she ordered two pain meds for him. As I was headed out the door to get them his panting got worse and, his gums were grey and then suddenly he stopped, his breaths became shallow and several seconds apart. I knew he was dying, he passed away on the way to our vet’s office.. It happened so fast!! , I feel so awful. . He was rescued at roughly a year old from the streets of NYC. He was abandoned and starved. I was so stressed about not letting the end of his life be full of suffering and I failed him. . He was loved by so many people, I had read the article about knowing when it’s time to euthanize your dog repeatedly over the past couple of weeks and had reviewed all the Q oL checklists. but I was not prepared for how it all happened. My heartbreak is beyond words, The emptiness in my heart and in this house is suffocating. Thank you for this beautiful website and for everyone who has shared their stories of their beloved pets.
Jenn,
My heart breaks for you. It sounds like you did everything you could to be prepared to make the decision to say goodbye, but there was no way you could have known things would progress so quickly for Tyson (and no way you could have changed the outcome). I know that his last few minutes were not what you would have wanted for him, but it sounds like he had a nice walk with you earlier in the day, and a good couple of months after his diagnosis. It may not feel like it now, but all those other moments before the last moments matter too. There is no doubt in my mind that he knew how much you loved him, and that he had a wonderful life with you. Thinking of you! ❤️
My dog is a 10.5 year old mixed breed of German shepherd and another unknown breed. I’ve had her since she was a few weeks old. She was recently (end of March 2023) diagnosed with cancer from a mast cell tumor. Her appetite has not decreased at all but she is very lethargic. She can’t stand too long without having to lay down and she barely makes it in the door after a short walk to lay down. I also just noticed a new growth/lump on the inside of her leg. She doesn’t seem to be in pain that I can tell. I’m calling the vet tomorrow. I don’t know if it’s time to let go and the thought of it makes me ill. I just don’t feel like I’m capable of making that decision. What do you think? Please help me.
Dear Sal,
My heart goes out to you and your senior pup. I am sorry her health is declining, and she is struggling with her daily routine. I hope your vet was able to offer some advice and guidance on how to navigate this emotional path. Without examining your girl, myself, it is hard to truly assess her quality of life. But from what you describe it does sound like you may have to say goodbye sooner rather than later. Letting go may be the only way to give your sweet girl freedom from her struggles and prevent unnecessary suffering. Praying for your strength and comfort. Bless you both. ♥
Hello
I had to make a very difficult decision and now I am regretting making it. My little princess suddenly stopped eating and eve time she had something to drink she threw up. When I took her to the ER they said she had acute kidney failure, and pneumonia. They also found a mass in her stomach area. The Dr said there wasn’t any hope and I should but her down. I was very skeptical but they said it would be hard on her breathing. I brought her home for a few hours and then took her back pet the drs suggestion. She was my only companion for 12 years and been though with me throughout all my difficulties. She was my savior more than I was hers. I feel I shouldn’t have put her down and could have tried to do everything to save he. I am going through a rough time alone in the house can’t eat or sleep. I feel I shouldn’t have lostenrd to the dr and not terminated her life. I can’t stop blaming myself and I can’t function without her.
Could I have saved her with her pneumonia and kidney failure? Did I make a mistake ?
No one around me seems to understand why I am devastated by my decision and I feel like I could have saved her for a little longer?
I know it’s too late now but I can’t seem to forgive myself for what happened.
Hello AmynahN,
My heart goes out to you. It is so easy to get buried under all the “what ifs” after losing a dog suddenly, and I can absolutely understand why you are so devastated. It is clear how much you loved her and that you wanted what was best for her, even if it meant having to say goodbye to her. You didn’t make a mistake. She was very sick and you made the best decision for her that you could based on the information you had at the time. I hope that in time some of the guilt you feel will lessen and you will be able to find peace in knowing that you did the right thing for her. Thinking about you! ❤️
I’m going to talk to my vet, but I think it might be time to say goodbye to my schnauzer, Gerti. I’ve had her nearly ten years after a sort-of rescue and she’s nearly 17. For at least the last year or two, her hearing and eyesight have gone, she has a torn ACL, spinal arthritis, and incontinence (most of which treated nicely by meds). She has a healthy appetite but what she’ll eat has narrowed significantly. Maybe a year ago she could eat her arthritis supplement without bribery but now she needs treats just to get started, often stopping once she finishes the treat and then pacing up to several hours. Often she seems confused and restless, staring at me when not pacing. She cannot go on walks or play anymore and recently my groomer said she couldn’t groom her due to her becoming distressed and not sitting still. She doesn’t seem to be in physical pain but she certainly isn’t the same dog from just two years ago. I keep waiting for a “proper” sign but now I think all of this IS the sign. These all seem to be signs of severe dementia, and I’m really glad I came across your message that too early is better than too late. I waited too long for my last dog, Rory, and it was the worst thing I’ve ever experienced. Is there any point to drawing out her life, even if there could be months left?
Dear Evan,
I am sorry you are facing this emotional decision for Gerti. As a dog nears the end of their life, there is a window of time where euthanasia is a good choice. Gerti may have just entered her window. So, while it may be ok to wait a while longer, it also would not be wrong to consider saying goodbye now. It is ok to let go while there is still some joy, before all happiness is lost and the only thing that remains is suffering. As humans we tend to look to the future and anticipate what may lie ahead. Dogs are not like this. They live in the present. So, if all today offers is pain and struggling, then letting go may be the most loving option. I will attach links to other articles with more information and great advice from other readers. Praying for your comfort and peace. Bless you and your sweet girl. ♥
1. Using a Quality of Life Scale for Dogs
2. Dementia in Dogs: When to Euthanize Your Beloved Senior Dog
3. Preparing for Your Dog’s Euthanasia: 10 Thoughts for Peace
Hi AmynahN,
I had a similar situation with my 19 year old terrier who suddenly had acute kidney failure with seizures and not being able to urinate. This came on suddenly and when i took him to the vet they said he has last stage kidney failure. He was confused and as barking out all night, something he never does. I decided at that moment to put hi to rest. I too have guilt about that decision. But, the truth is that even if i took him home another night or a few nights his end was coming. I feel for you with your princess. My dog was my everything and i miss him so much. I needed him and he got me through everything. I cant guilt myself nor can you. We both acted out of compassion to not see them suffer. Its the most painful thing to do it but i couldn’t bare putting him through agonizing treatment for a few days or a week. Hope you are feeling better and at peace with it now. Im trying to be as well.
Dear Debra,
Your words are so full of compassion and care. Thank you for sharing your experience and offering sympathy. I am sorry for the loss of your senior pup. Wishing you comfort and peace for your heart.
This must be the 50th article I’ve read about how to decide THE time….our sweet girl, Nilla, was diagnosed in February with a neuroendocrine carcinoma near her airway. We planned to have it surgically removed but when they had her open, it was too diffuse to get good margins. So here we are, 3 months later, struggling to make the final call. We absolutely do not want her to suffer (air hunger is truly a terrible feeling) but it is so hard to use the usual tools since she is perfectly healthy otherwise and mentally intact. She is still eating and drinking, loves to play and walk (although her tolerance has declined, but she is still excited and trotting along), and hasn’t had any major behavioral changes. Any advice on how to decide based solely on a respiratory standpoint? She is on prednisone and I think that has done wonders, but it does make her pant and restless…so it’s hard to tell if those symptoms are still just drug side effects or clinical symptoms. I really appreciate all that you guys do, helping us all love our fur babies the best way possible 💕
Dear Danielle,
I am so sorry you are facing this difficult decision for Nilla. I understand how hard it can be to truly assess quality of life especially when a beloved pup is very mentally healthy. I wish I had specific details for you to monitor, but things just aren’t that straight forward. I will say I think it is better to let go one day too early rather than one day too late and allow unnecessary suffering. From what you describe, the time to say goodbye may not be far off but your girl still seems to be finding joy in her days and enjoying life with those who love her most. My thoughts are with you as you navigate this emotional path. Bless you both. ♥
Five days ago, we had to say goodbye to our beloved Ellie, an 11.5 yr old Papillon. 17 months ago she was diagnosed with kidney disease. A low-protein kidney diet was started, along with BP meds for hypertension. She responded well and had a much improved quality of life. A year later her kidney values had not changed. A few weeks ago, her appetite decreased, and episodes of vomiting and diarrhea reoccurred. She still seemed playful at times, and enjoyed barking at all the 4-legged creatures in the neighborhood-dogs, squirrels, bunnies. But early Tuesday morning, Ellie woke us up yelping in pain. Her abdomen was rigid and she nipped me as I tried to comfort her. Shortly after, she rested at the foot of our bed. A few hours later she experienced vomiting white foam, labored breathing, generalized weakness, incontinence, seizures, parlor. I called our vet & arranged to bring her in. She was alert the whole morning, which made it harder to say goodbye, Her decline was so rapid, I feel guilty that I may have missed the signs earlier to minimize her suffering at the end. Her last moments were peaceful while she calmly laid on my lap while being cuddled as she was euthanized. My heart is broken without her, but the memories are sweet. Eleven years with her was not enough.
Thank you for all your words of wisdom and kind tips that ease the pain & guilt of so many families.
Dear Melanie,
My heart aches for you as you grieve the loss of Ellie. I truly don’t think you missed anything as kidney disease can progress to an end stage very suddenly with no warning. I am glad you were able to be with your girl during her final moments and am certain your presence was a comfort. It is clear Ellie was dearly loved and I am sure she knew. May her memory be a blessing to you as you continue life’s journey. Thank you for sharing her story. ♥
I adopted Kit, a 14 year old Chi / Pomeranian cross a year ago. When I adopted him, I didn’t know he was already showing signs of dementia.
At first it was just the occasional pacing. But now he paces constantly, especially at night. I find that if I take him to bed with me, he calms down. Last night I tucked in him and woke up at 3am this morning covered in dog feces. This isn’t the first time this has happened. He also poops in his doggy bed and just sleeps in it. His back legs are starting to go so that when he squats to defecate, half the time he ends up falling in his business.
Trying to get him to eat is a challenge. He’ll go an entire day without eating and then the next day gobble up everything in sight.
I’m kind of at my wit’s end. We’ve never really formed a bond in the year we’ve been together, he just doesn’t really want to have anything to do with me. It’s all very sad.
April
Dear April,
My heart goes out to you as you deal with these symptoms of dementia in your pup. I know you wanted to give him love and allow him to enjoy his senior years, but it sounds like you may be saying goodbye sooner than expected. Bless you for offering up your home to this poor boy. I will attach links to other articles with more information on how to prepare for making this difficult decision. I wish you strength and peace. ♥
1. Dementia in Dogs: When to Euthanize Your Beloved Senior Dog
2. Using a Quality of Life Scale for Dogs
3. Preparing for Your Dog’s Euthanasia: 10 Thoughts for Peace
My dog is 16 and a half. I am disabled and I’ve had her for all of these years. She is my heart. My mom died 2 years ago and she got me through the last 2 years. She has dementia but she’s still eats she can’t hear and she can’t see well at all. She’s peeing on the carpet and I’m in the process of selling my apartment because I’m disabled and don’t have the money to stay here. I also have a chronic illness and sleep is an issue for me. She cries a lot for food and often just stands and cries for food and when I feed her she starts crying again. I am also moving overseas in 5 months and I know she won’t be able to make the journey. This is the hardest decision I can make because when I had another dog he was very ill physically and I knew when it was time. With this I don’t know when it’s time and I just keep hoping she passes in her sleep but that doesn’t happen. Right now she’s just standing and crying and then I’ll feed her and she’ll stop but then she’ll start again. She is sleeping through the night. When that stops I will have to put her to sleep because I have made you sleep issues that are brain injury and I can’t afford to lose even more sleep. Again I don’t know what to do because I’ve only dealt with the dog with physical issues and I knew exactly when to put her down. This is the dog that got me through the last 15 years that have been very difficult. I have a new life waiting for me overseas. There’s no way she can make the trip and I feel guilty and yet her quality of life is not good and I’m getting exhausted from it. She’s still eating though and has a very good appetite. I don’t know what to do
Hi Jules,
It is clear now much you love your dog and how much she means to you. My heart breaks for you as you face the difficult decision to let her go. It is definitely easier in some ways to know when it is time to euthanize a dog with a physical condition than a mental one. However, I often remind my clients that dementia and canine cognitive dysfunction are real diseases too, and ones that can cause suffering and a decline in quality of life just like the more obvious physical ailments.
My dear friend Dr. Woodruff does a lovely job of addressing how to make the decision to euthanize a dog with dementia. I’ll link her article below because I think it might provide some clarity and peace. Thinking about you as you facing the loss of your sweet pup and prepare to start your new life overseas. What a mix of emotions that must be.
Here is the article I mentioned: Dementia in Dogs: When to Euthanize Your Beloved Senior Dog
I wanted to say thank you for this. We have a 13 yo husky with a seizure disorder that meds can’t manage anymore. She’s crossing the rainbow bridge today
Dear Meagan,
I am sorry for the loss of your beloved pup. My thoughts are with you during this difficult time. May her memory be a blessing as you continue life’s journey. ♥
My 17 yo poodle has been sleeping almost 23 hours a day. Her legs are weak so can’t walk much. She was eating fine until today she’s stopped eating. I will bring her to the vet for check up tmr but my feeling is not good. I’m scared and don’t want to lose her. I feel so helpless. I’m hoping for miracles. It’s so hard when u know the time is approaching but I really don’t want to face it.
Dear Fi,
My heart goes out to you as you face this difficult decision for your senior girl. I know you don’t want to let go too early, but sometimes saying goodbye is the most loving option and only way to free your beloved pup from her struggles. I always think it is better to let go one day too early rather than one day too late and allow unnecessary suffering. I am glad you have an appointment scheduled with your vet. They can give you their honest opinion about your girl’s quality of life. I am hopeful you will find the answers and advice you need to make the best choice for everyone involved. Praying for clarity and strength to navigate this emotional path.
Hi,
Yesterday, I decided to put my beloved Kramer (Mini Schnauzer & 13 years old) down. My husband and I took him to the emergency vet as Kramer was vomiting(night before), refusing to eat or drink, breathing rapidly and weak. He didn’t even want to pick up his head. The vet came in and the look on her face I knew it wasn’t good. She told me that Kramer had a giant mass on his spleen that may have ruptured based on his pale gums, rapid breathing, heart flutters, and weakness, saying he doesn’t even want to stand.
Kramer a year ago was diagnosed with Enlarged heart and Cushing disease which he received medication daily for both of those conditions. I even tried to get Kramer in for his teeth cleaning and his heart couldn’t undergo the procedure, fluttering. Kramer towards the end hated taking these pills. I hide them in every possible food I could think of.
Kramer was beginning to go blind. As well as the vertebrae’s in his spine were pinching down on his nerve so he had a harder time walking but a joint supplement helped some but still would slide around a bit on hard floor surfaces.
As I took this all in, I realized this old dog had too many cards stacked against him and as much as I love him. I didn’t want him in pain and to suffer. I feel like Kramer wouldn’t have made it through surgery to remove the mass, he would have a hard time healing, maybe live 30 days after surgery, possibly cancer treatments if it hadn’t spread to other organs.
I hate that he is gone. Crying lots but I felt like putting him through surgery, recovery and possible treatments on top of everything else wouldn’t be good for Kramer.
Dear Heather,
My heart goes out to you with your recent loss of Kramer. I agree with your decision to forgo a risky surgery with a poor prognosis to instead give your sweet boy peace and rest from his suffering. You made the loving choice to allow your own heart to break so Kramer could be free from his pain. It is obvious he was dearly loved, and I am certain he knew. I hope with time your heart will heal. May Kramer’s memory be a blessing and a comfort as you continue life’s journey. ♥
Our little 17-year-old Lucy has KD, she’s getting sub-c every three days, and we are giving her her special diet, and her meds … she won’t eat so we give her something to give her an appetite… sometimes that works, but most times not so much. She will eat something one minute, and the next time we offer it to her again, she refuses it. We give her something else she takes, and two seconds later she doesn’t want it … she won’t even eat her favorite treats … the vet said normally we should not give her old treats but she needs to eat so now we are told just give her whatever she wants, she has to eat …. we don’t know what that is anymore. She’s had subcutaneous fluids injected … I don’t see that she’s peeing very much. Three days ago she seemed almost like her old self, but since then she sleeps most of the time, and always seems sad when she looks up at us, is she telling us she’s ready? My husband and I are beside ourselves … we don’t want to be selfish and keep giving her shots and meds and sprays in the mouth, and constant trips to the vet which causes her to shake just to keep her around longer. We love our little Lucy so much, we will miss her terribly. So, we struggle … when is the right time, even if she has moments when things seem normal … do we just keep going with her. So, hard, so very hard.
Dear Louise,
I am so sorry you are in this difficult situation with Lucy. It does sound like she is nearing her last days and her health is declining. It is never easy making the decision to say goodbye, but I do think it is better to let go one day too early rather than one day too late and allow unnecessary suffering. I will attach links to other articles with more information and great advice from other readers. I hope you can find the answers you need to make the best choice for you and your sweet girl. Wishing you strength and clarity for the tough decisions ahead. Bless you all.
1. Dog Kidney Failure: When to Euthanize Your Dear Dog
2. Using a Quality of Life Scale for Dogs
3. Preparing for Your Dog’s Euthanasia: 10 Thoughts for Peace
We adopted our Sadie (beagle/terrier mix) from a friend who had rescued her from a shelter several years before she had her youngest daughter. Sadie wasn’t fond of a baby in the house so we took her in. We are unsure of her actual age but guesstimate that it is between 14 – 16 years. I think she has CCD and have asked our vet about her cognition. He feels (at the last check up a few weeks ago) that she is doing fine, and up until a week ago I agreed. She has started walking in circles and pacing at night lately and I’ve noticed more changes in her behavior. I plan to have her reassessed by her vet hopefully next week. The problem I encounter is my husband. He does not believe in euthanasia for our dogs–he feels they should leave Earth when it is their “time”, translate that to whenever they pass on their own. I watched our 13 year old lab struggle to breathe and walk, have accident after accident in the house (which hubby would get mad about) and it completely broke my heart. She finally passed away a couple of weeks before her birthday at the end of June a few years ago. Hubby says she passed away in her sleep but I feel that she probably suffocated due to the horrendous summer heat we were having and just didn’t have the breath to walk inside (she would lay under the bushes next to our house). As I watch Sadie struggle more I don’t think I can go through the same emotions I went through with our lab. I hate making THE decision because I know I won’t have any support from my husband. I just don’t know what to do. I feel like we are to the point we need to discuss this decision–she just looks so sad and miserable every day–but don’t know how to approach this with my husband. Does anyone have advice on how the best way to handle this situation?
Dear Christy,
My heart goes out to you with this difficult situation you are in with Sadie. I am so sorry you are bearing the weight of this on your own. The only thing I know to recommend is maybe discuss this with your vet and then see if your husband would be willing to go with you to a “quality of life assessment” appointment. There your vet could express the need to help Sadie be free from her suffering and give your husband their expert opinion. I am not sure that would be enough to convince him to say goodbye, but it may be worth a try. You could also appeal to him from the standpoint of your emotional wellbeing. Let him know this is something YOU need, and you are asking him to support YOU. My thoughts are with you as you navigate this hard path. Praying for your strength and comfort. ♥
I just had to put my 16 year old shin Tuzla to sleep. Maddie was almost totally blind and had lost her hearing. She quit eating her normal food and started drinking tons of water. I tried to feed her lots of things she would normally eat but she might eat a bite or two and that’s all. She started wetting the bed at night and having accidents in the house. This lasted about a week and I took her to the vet. Maddie spend everyday with me since I retired and she slept with me every night. The vet said she was suffering from acute kidney failure. To say I was shocked was an understatement. My heart was broken. She was past being able to help her without leaving her at the vet for IV therapy and they couldn’t guarantee it would help her numbers at all. This would probably have to be done weekly for a while. I couldn’t imagine leaving her alone at the clinic for 24-48 hours she would have been so scared and upset without me. I couldn’t do that to her..when I went to the grocery store she would get anxious until I came back. We decided to go ahead and have her put to sleep that day because she was as good as it was going to get and would become worse quickly. My heart is broken , I can’t quit crying and I miss her so much that it’s hard to breathe . The vet was so sweet and said if it was her dog she would do the same thing, she knew Maddie well from treating her for so many years. I just feel guilty and I feel maybe I did the wrong thing, I was there and looking into her eyes and telling her how much I loved her. I hope she knew how much I loved her to end her life that way. I just feel so sad…..
Dear Gina,
I am so sorry for your loss of Maddie. I can only imagine how difficult it must have been to make the decision to say goodbye. You definitely did the right thing by offering your sweet girl peace and rest from her struggles. What a blessing you were able to be by her side even during her final moments. I am certain she was comforted by your presence and knew how much she was loved. I know your heart is broken and grieving, but I hope her memory will be a blessing in your life for years to come. Praying for your comfort and strength. ♥
We have a 14ish lab mix who was dumped at our farm 13 years ago. He was still in puppyhood and about half the size he is now. We named him Cap’t Jack Sparrow because our granddaughter had a poodle she named The Black Pearl.! Jack has been the best dog I’ve ever had among the many that I’ve loved over the years. He became best friends with my Arabian mare and they would play together for hours. She even let him swing from her tail! We have many members of our family and everyone loves Jack. Within the last year I’ve noticed that he seems confused and forgetful. He eats his food but not with the gusto of before…he’s probably lost a little weight as well. He is mostly okay during the day but the Sundowning he experiences at night is alarming. He paces and pants and acts afraid of things I can’t see nor hear. None of the meds his vet have prescribed have helped. We have started taking turns being with him at night so one of us can rest. We are seniors ourselves so this is wearing us out. Our next step is to take him with us when we snowbird south to the gulf shore in hopes that he’ll have a better day and night experience. He seems happy and active and interactive during the day with no accidents as yet in the house. I at least want to give him a chance to enjoy the beach one more time before I make THE decision. At least I know that he’s had the best life and whoever dumped him lost out on a wonderful pal and companion.
Hi Katherine,
I can only imagine how difficult it is to watch Jack’s health slowly decline. He sounds like a once in a lifetime kind of pup and you were both so lucky to find each other so many years ago. I think it is great you are trying to give him one more beach trip and bring joy to his final days. I know the decision to say goodbye won’t be easy, but I pray you will have the strength and clarity when the time comes. Thank you for sharing your story with us. Wishing you all the best and give your sweet boy a hug for me. ♥
I’m sitting here with my coffee and crying. I have inherited my MIL’s dog. He is just shy of 15, a few weeks to go.
We’ve been battling dementia for two years now.
Nights are BAD.
Health issues are many. Arthritis in all legs, can’t see, smell, and even his hearing is going.. he licks incessantly at night, dental disease, collapsed trachea, his epiglottis doesn’t work properly. Urinating in the house several times a day, enlarged liver. Sundowning is horrific. Nightly battle for him to settle. He’s on 4 medications and none seem to help.
He still has bursts of playtime each day. He still likes toys. Food intake has diminished some and water intake increased.
I’m struggling. I’m feeling like euthanasia will be for us, not him. That playtime each day is what’s stopping me from making the appointment. My vet is fantastic and knows what we’re going through.
My MIL was sick and this pup didn’t see a vet for seven years before we got him.
My vet says he will never question me when I say it’s time.
But I am questioning me.
Dear Tara,
My heart goes out to you with this difficult decision you are facing. It sounds like your senior guy’s mental and physical health are greatly diminished. I know you mentioned he has bursts of playtime each day, but I am not sure that outweighs the struggling he faces the other 23 hours a day. Even though I know you don’t want euthanasia to be for “you”, your quality of life still matters. I like to think that by choosing to say goodbye, we have control over how your dog’s last moments are spent. We can make sure his last days are filled with his favorite things and he is extra spoiled. Then when the time comes, his transition can be peaceful and smooth, surrounded by the ones that love him most. It is better to let go one day too early rather than one day too late and allow unnecessary suffering. I will attach links to other articles that may offer additional information and great comments from other readers. I hope you can find the strength to make these tough decisions in the coming days. Bless you for being willing to take on the responsibility of this senior pup.
1. Dementia in Dogs: When to Euthanize Your Beloved Senior Dog
2. Preparing for Your Dog’s Euthanasia: 10 Thoughts for Peace
3. Grieving the Loss of a Dog After Euthanasia (& Finding Peace)
Well, this never gets better.
We had 5 dogs. Three elders and two brothers 6 years old. So far this year our 17 and 18 year olds had to be put down.
Both were just worn out by age. Blind and deaf they still greeted us at the door. Our vet was amazing. He just said “they will tell you when its time” and he was right.
Just today, I learned my 12 year old, Lucy has serious acute renal failure.
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Maybe she’ll make it through the weekend…..who knows. She wont eat.
She looks so sad. Yet her tail is wagging and shes still barking at the delivery people.
Three dogs in one year.
It just breaks your heart.
But my wife says, “they were happy and had beautiful lives. Well cared for. Lots of space to run and play, a family that loved them. You can’t focus on the end, but the amazing life they had and the joy they bring. A home without a dog, is just a house.”
Dear Rick,
I am sorry for all the losses you have endured this year. You are right, it never gets easier no matter how many times you live through it. My heart goes out to you during these last days with Lucy. I pray her transition is smooth and your heart will find comfort in the memories of all the good times shared. I love the quote from your wife: “A home without a dog, is just a house.” ♥
My beautiful. Sweet great Dane is 11 1/2! We are so thankful for her long life, she is a gift from God. We had two previous die suddenly of bloat. It is so hard to see her decline because of issues with her back and legs. She still eats, but I can see she is getting more and more uncomfortable, she is already taking lots of medicines. Do I wait til she can’t walk anymore? How do you put down a dog who’ s mind is still good.? In one part it was said, you have waited too long when they can’t get up, or are incontinent. It is a gift to let them not be in pain. This helps me somewhat with the time line. Thanks.
Hi Dawn,
I understand how difficult it can be to determine when it is the “right time” to say goodbye. This timing is different for every dog and every owner. You definitely don’t have to wait till your big girl can’t walk anymore. It is ok to let them go peacefully before they hit rock bottom. I always think it is better to let go one day too early rather than one day too late and allow them to suffer needlessly. I will attach links to other articles that may offer additional information and great comments from other readers. What a blessing to have had your sweet girl for over 11 years!!! I pray her last days will be filled with love and joy. Give her a hug for me. ♥
1. Dog Euthanasia: Knowing When to Say Goodbye
2. Preparing for Your Dog’s Euthanasia: 10 Thoughts for Peace
3. Signs Your Dog is Dying: A Caring Message to Bring You Peace
This past year has been very rough for me and my 17 year old JRT. He started out with bronchitis, which was easily cleared with doxycycline. But soon as that was gone, I noticed the abcessed tooth. After nearly a month of pre op work up including x-rays and echocardiograms, he had his dental procedure with 11 teeth extractions. Unfortunately, one of the spots wasn’t healing very well, and I had to re-visit the vet for it. But, after about a week, we got it healed. Same say as the follow up visit for his teeth, I had them take another chest of x-ray, as he had been coughing a lot more, which I was told could unfortunately happen due to the breathing tube aggravating his collapsed trachea. Well, that chest x-ray showed what was called pneumonia at the time, so he was put on doxycycline again. But he was getting worse instead of better. He was coughing more, his belly was tense, and he just didn’t seem right. I convinced myself everything was just his pneumonia, or painful back and hips. Otherwise than the cough, and what I thought was back pain, was eating and acting mostly normal. I convinced myself he was fine, and went to work. When I got home in the morning, I was very scared to see he was coughing up blood. By then there was no denying something was wrong. I rushed him to the emergency vet, only to be shocked to be told his chest cavity was filled with fluid, most likely caused by cancer. All I could do was cry. They drained the fluid, said they would run a pathology report on it, and let me take him home, as he was stable at that time.
By then, I had already made up my mind that at 17, I wasn’t going to put him through any more invasive tests, needles, or pain.
We ate dinner, I have him a small amount of my cheeseburger, watched TV, and had a couple small walks.
Then off to bed. He was very snuggly, as he really had been the past few weeks. He slept well until about 5am, when we woke up and I could tell he was struggling again.
Back to the emergency vet. Unfortunately, not even 12 hours later, his chest was almost full again. I couldn’t put him through anything else, and decided it was best to let him go. We were set up in a room where I shared some snacks and cheese slices, which even until the end, he still gobbled down. Finally, the vet came in, we set him up in the bed I happened to have in the car for him, and she gave him some medicine.
I guess I thought I would have had more time before he was gone to talk to him, pet him, and comfort him. The vet and I were talking, sitting on the floor with him, and then a second later, she said he was gone, and he didn’t fight the medication at all. I know he was tired, and I and hindsight, I can see he had been for a little while, but the fact that I didn’t really get to say goodbye is still tearing me up.
The fact that I convinced myself everything was fine and went to work, is killing me. I feel so guilty. I am constantly questioning my decisions. Did I do enough, or did I do something wrong.
In the end I know it was the right choice, but the fact that I didn’t get to say goodbye, and that he was suffering longer than I would let myself believe, it tearing up my heart.
Dear Abby,
I am sorry your heart is grieving the loss of your little guy. It sounds like you did everything you could, and I would have made all the same decisions had I been in your shoes. I have no doubt your senior boy knew how much he was loved. What a peaceful way to pass on, lying next to the one you love most and hearing their voice until the very last second. I know you wish you had said “goodbye”, but I truly think it was a comforting experience for your pup. Try not to let the “what ifs” cause unnecessary pain and allow his sweet memory to be a blessing as you continue life’s journey.
After reading all the comments on others making the decisions it is making mine harder. I have a 21 year old Yorker that we have has since he was 6 weeks old. He is the family dog and the neighborhood dog everyone knows him he has always been very friendly to this day. He is now blind can’t see nothing but a shadow in light. It doesn’t seem to bother him as much as me but he still acts like a puppy and is eating like a champ. He forgets he ate sometimes and tries to come back for more. He is having accidents in the house it doesn’t bother me as much as my husband. My question is when will I know he is pretty healthy doesn’t have anything physically wrong. I just can’t even imagine our lives without him. He had been there for all of us and he still wakes me like an alarm clock daily at 7am. Even thou he has already went to the bathroom on the floor. My husband says it’s time I still see the playfulness when the grandkids walk in the door he knows they are here by smell. When anyone comes thru the door he knows and jumps in joy every time. He still takes his walks but doesn’t know which way to go he also is loosing his hearing so when called he will walk in circles cause he doesn’t know which way the voice is. My fear is him falling down the steps or something. He walks into everything but turns and finally goes the right way. I know it isn’t much longer but he’s still the happy pup and it’s hard to see him this way when he bumps into things or falls the 3 inches off the patio to goto the bathroom. I don’t want to have him not be him but like I said he still greets anyone that walks in the door with the jumping and barking if he hears someone he doesn’t know talking. He looks at things and whines thinking it’s me to feed him at 5pm he knows it dinner time. He gets chicken and carrots plus his dog food every day since we got him so he knows his times still. I’m so crushed that the age is finally catching up to him but don’t want him not to be able to see either. Someone give me some advise on this. I know it’s going to tear me apart but I also know it’s for him not me. Help
Dear Gina,
I am sorry your little guy is declining mentally and starting to struggle more. It sounds like he is physically ok but may be suffering from the effects of canine cognitive dysfunction. I will attach links to other articles that may offer additional information. It might be a good idea to talk to a vet in your area that practices hospice and palliative care. They can offer you ways to make sure your boy is comfortable and happy and let you know when it is time to consider euthanasia. I hope you can find the answers you need to make the best decision for your pup. My heart goes out to you during this difficult and trying time. Bless you both.
1. Canine Cognitive Dysfunction in Dogs: Signs, Symptoms, Solutions
2. Dementia in Dogs: When to Euthanize Your Beloved Senior Dog
3. Dog Hospice Care Can Bring Peace and Dignity to Your Dog’s Final Days
4. Preparing for Your Dog’s Euthanasia: 10 Thoughts for Peace
Our chi weenie Harley has developed dementia. I won’t go Into all his symptoms but the hard part is the “ sundowner” part. He’s pretty ok during the day but at night he becomes vicious. You can’t even touch him without him trying to bite you. Right now both my hands and my husbands hands are bandaged from bad bites. We’ve tried all the tricks, like talking to him first or throwing a towel over him but sometimes he’s just faster than we are. We’re at our wits end. So tired of being bitten. He’s supposedly 12 years old but we think he’s probably older. He has other medical issues ( chronic pancreatitis, heart murmur, collapsing trachea). We’re struggling with what to do about him. Do we euthanize him or not?
Dear Diane,
I am sorry you are dealing with such severe symptoms in your senior guy. It sounds like his quality of life is suffering since I can’t imagine these manic episodes are happy or comforting for him. Please make sure you are taking your own quality of life into account. As much as you love him, you should not have to put your own health at risk to prolong the life of your little guy. I definitely think letting go is probably the most loving option in your situation. I pray your heart will be comforted knowing you allowed him to find peace and rest. Bless you both. ♥
I have a 16 1/2 year old Jack Russell “Jake”in final stages of dementia. He is confused, seems afraid, has spinal issues . He is fairly mobile but very unsteady on his feet. My vet said he probably hasn’t much feeling in his feet due to spinal issues.. Jake still etas and drinks and seems to know who I am but I k is his quality of life is no longer good. The last few days he has slept a lot during the day . I’m struggling with putting him down as I feel he is tired and worn out, He falls down sometimes and can’t get up and I’m afraid to leave him alone , although I leave him confined to one room if I have to leave the house .. my heart is breaking . Can someone help with advice ?
Dear Kathy,
I am sorry Jake is struggling and seems to be declining in health. I understand your concern and the want to find a solution. Unfortunately, it does sound like he may be nearing the end of his life. I will attach links to other articles that may offer additional information and great advice from other readers in the comments. Even though letting go will cause heartbreak, sometimes it is the most loving and unselfish decision we can make for a beloved dog. It is better to say goodbye one day too early rather than one day too late and allow unnecessary suffering. I hope you can find the answers you need to make the best decision for you and Jake. I hope your sweet boy will find peace and rest and your heart will be comforted.
1. Dementia in Dogs: When to Euthanize Your Beloved Senior Dog
2. Preparing for Your Dog’s Euthanasia: 10 Thoughts for Peace
3. Dog Euthanasia: Knowing When to Say Goodbye
Thank you so much .. I can’t imagine today will be his last day with me if I follow through with this tomorrow morning. What bothers me the most is that he is still mobile although his balance is failing, and eats and drinks.. he knows where his food and water is ..
He seems to feel safe and at peace when I hold him and then he gets restless and wants to pace .. I thank you again for your help and I’m still praying God will take him before tomorrow..
I have had my Dog Cujo for almost 16yrs and he is a mix, he was just a pup when I bought him from a person who was going to use him to train a pit to fight and kill and I just could not allow for this little pup at the time to be treated like this. So I paid the man (if you want to call him that?) way more than he was worth but it was the best money that I ever spent, but now after 16 yrs of him being a great dog and friend it hurts to let him go. If I was to keep him alive I would not be any better than the person I bought him from. It will be hard on the family and I but it has to be done. After reading some of these comments I feel a lot better letting him go on to a better place. Thank you.
Dear Daryl,
Cujo sounds like a once in a lifetime pup and what a blessing you have been to each other over the past 16 years! I understand how difficult saying goodbye can be, but it comes from a place of love. Allowing a beloved dog to find peace and rest is worth all the heartache it brings us. I hope his last days will be full of love and joy. Praying with time your heart will be comforted and his memory will be a blessing to you and your family.
I was blessed when my 16 year old cocker spaniel died in her sleep many years ago but this early morning I am looking at my almost 17 year old doggie thinking it may be time to have her euthanized. She appeared to have a grand mail seizure and just laid in my arms for an hour later. I’m watching her sleep praying aloud she will go in her sleep like my other dog but I am preparing myself to call vet if not in the morning. Thank you so much for your article and kind words.
Dear Ali,
I hope your sweet girl has found peace and rest. May her memory be a blessing. ♥
You made an interesting point when you explained that you shouldn’t wait too long to put a dog to rest so that you don’t have to lament about it later. It seems like having a veterinarian come to your home to put a pet to rest would help create a peaceful moment for the animal. Being in a familiar environment seems like it would make it easier for the aminal.
Henry,
You are exactly right—in-home euthanasia can be a great option for many dogs and families for those reasons and more. My friend Dr. Dawnetta Woodruff (who is an in-home euthanasia and hospice veterinarian) recently wrote a beautiful and heartfelt blog for me about that topic (In-Home Dog Euthanasia: Heartfelt Answers to 12 FAQs). I hope you find it helpful!
My 13 year old dog was diagnosed with a large aggressive lung tumor last week. We walk a mile a day then a week ago his back legs kept collapsing when he would stand for a few seconds. He wouldn’t eat but would drink. Now with prednisone he is back to walking very very slowly but seems to want to. He coughs (seems decreased after prednisone though) and his breathing is different- heaving sides and faster. The vet said 2-6 months. I don’t want him to suffer one minute. With the steroid he’s eating more than he ever has. He stays near me all the time but doesn’t want to be picked up. Can you tell me if he’s suffering?
Hello Zane, very insightful questions. First, I’m so sorry that you and your dog are going through this. I don’t think he is in pain, like you’d experience with a broken bone. Is he uncomfortable? I don’t know. If he’s still eating and willing to get around, those are all positive signs. Prednisone can work wonders for these guys temporarily and actually has some chemotherapeutic effects. Be aware that it may change his breathing, unrelated to the tumor. I think I’d just enjoy him feeling better for as long as possible, and I do believe that you will know if he’s suffering. I also think this blog will help you: https://toegrips.com/signs-your-dog-is-dying/ Much love to you both. ♥️
I have a 15-year-old Yorkie named Molly. She has been a spirited little dog and has my 16-year-old Yorkie named Max as her BFF. Molly has always been healthy, great appetite, and playful. A few weeks ago she started not eating her dry food, I never gave them soft food. They have had bits of apples and carrots for snacks. An occasional peanut butter dog biscuit.
I took her to the vet and her mouth and teeth are a mess. Plaque that is so thick you cannot even see the teeth. I never had her teeth cleaned due to financial restraints, but I did have Max’s teeth cleaned when he was 5.
Anyway, I was referred to dentistry for the middle of November to have the plaque removed and teeth extracted if needed. The vet told me her kidney levels were a bit high, and that she had the beginning of kidney failure. He wants to put her on a kidney diet. She has been taking clindamycin for the infection, but she screams in pain if anything touches her face. She won’t eat. I have blended canned dog food for her and more or less have to sit with her and keep encouraging her to eat. It is so painful I can’t even put the dropper of antibiotic in her mouth without her screaming. She is shaking and just miserable. Sleeps most of the day. She is still doing her potty fine. My question is of course with the agony that she is in, I cannot see her waiting until Nov for treatment. She is so sad and her quality of life is just not what it used to be even weeks ago.
I am considering foregoing the treatment and thinking of having a home euthanasia. I want a quality of life for her, but I’m wondering if the mouth infection/teeth are too far gone? I’m worried about the anesthesia with her kidney function. I am thinking of completing the antibiotics for the 10 day course. The vet is giving me gabapentin and a mouthwash for her pain. He can’t use NSAIDs b/c of the kidney function. I’m struggling with this.
I’m so sorry to hear that your dog is not doing well. This is a really tough call, and I understand your concerns. If we knew with relative certainty that the primary problem was just limted to her mouth, I would strongly advise you to pursue the dental procedure for Molly. (And try to move it up, if at all possible!!!) I’ve literally seen old dogs act like puppies again after the infection and pain was cleared from their mouths. Here’s my true stories on the topic in senior dogs:
https://toegrips.com/senior-dog-anesthesia
https://toegrips.com/is-my-dog-too-old-for-surgery
It’s likely that after the dental procedure, her kidneys may gradually even get a bit better too. Currently they are getting showered by bacteria from the mouth via the bloodstream.
I would ask to speak with your vet about the pros and cons for getting the major dental procedure done, and ask about an earlier appointment slot–even if you have to travel to a different location to see a specialist sooner! I wish you and your dog all the best!
Thank you for the article. We just put down our beloved rescue Boxer/Retriever of 13 years on Monday morning. She was so loved by everyone in our family and the perfect pet. She had very bad arthritis in her hips and was diagnosed with critical 3rd degree AV blockage in her heart when we took her to the emergency vet after noticing she wasn’t acting right the last couple days. The last few days she struggled to breath, wouldn’t eat and couldn’t walk across the room without stopping to rest, much less make it down a couple steps to go outside from her struggle with arthritis. Our only options were looking into surgery to implant a Pacemaker or letting our beloved Sasha girl go. The vet wouldn’t guarantee she would live another year or two even with the procedure. I think I’ll always wonder if we made the right decision or if there was something more we could have done to help prevent this. Despite the complications she had a smile on her face up until our last moments with her and I’ll always cherish how happy we made each other. I would give anything to have more time with my beloved girl but couldn’t imagine the further pain she’d endure post-surgery and from her arthritis. Love you so much Sasha and I pray everyday we’ll see each other again.
Hello Dan, Thank you for taking the time to share this tribute to Sasha. I’m so sorry to hear of your loss. I’m a huge believer in parents’ intuition and, ultimately, I’m confident that you made the right decision for your girl. May the memories of your beloved Sasha bring you comfort during this difficult time.
It has been a week ago this afternoon that our beloved almost 14 year old Lab-Husky girl named Alex was put to rest. It was and still is the most difficult decision I have ever had to make. I loved her so much that my heart is shattered.
She helped me thru some bad times and loved me so unconditionally !
My husband and I made the difficult decision to let her get her well deserved rest. I witnessed her passing and while I was extremely heartbroken, she did look very peaceful.
I am still grieving, my heart is broken, but I am just starting to hope that we made the right decision at the right time.
I will never ever forget her and I hope that when I cross over, she will be there to greet me.
Love you so so very much my sweet girl. Enjoy eternal peace free of pain.
Momma and Poppa
Dear Lynne, My heart breaks with yours because I can empathize so fully with your pain. Of this I can assure you—you made the right decision for Alex and gave her the final gift of self-sacrificial love. You chose what was best for her—to let her go and be free from pain—even though it was the hardest thing you’ve ever done. May God comfort your shattered heart as only He can. I’m so sorry for your loss.