A quality of life scale for dogs can be a helpful way to objectively assess your dog’s comfort, happiness, and overall well-being. Integrative veterinarian Dr. Julie Buzby explains the concept of quality of life, discusses ways to assess it (including sharing her favorite quality of life scales for dogs), and explains what to do when you see your dog’s quality of life beginning to decline.
Dogs play such an enormous role in our lives—as best friends, confidants, and family members. No matter what, we know they love us unconditionally.
However, the sad reality is that we often outlive our beloved dogs. As our dear companions begin to fade away, their quality of life may weigh heavily on our minds. We may watch and worry—questioning whether our beloved companions are still enjoying life.
One way to help answer that question is by using a quality of life scale for dogs. It can provide an objective way for you to evaluate your senior dog’s quality of life and allow you to pick up on small changes in your dog that otherwise may go unnoticed. To understand the quality of life scale, let’s start by defining “quality of life.”
What is considered “quality of life” for a dog?
Quality of life means different things to different people. At its most basic, this term refers to a dog’s daily lifestyle, whether his or her basic needs are met, and how he or she is feeling. A good quality life for a dog may mean:
- Eating and drinking normal amounts (and looking forward to food and treats)
- Being able to play with toys, family members, or other dogs
- Enjoying taking walks, hikes, swimming, etc.
- Resting comfortably and being able to sleep (but not sleeping excessively)
- Enjoying spending time with family members
- Being able to hold urine and feces until getting outside
- Having tolerable pain levels (or ideally no pain)
- Being free of fear or confusion
- Finding enjoyment in favorite activities
Regardless of which activities matter most to you and your dog, the general concept is the same. Every dog deserves to be as happy, healthy, and comfortable as possible. This is the case even—or perhaps especially—in times of illness and during a dog’s senior years.
Why assess a dog’s quality of life?
It can be natural to think more about quality of life when your dog has been diagnosed with a terminal disease or is struggling with the effects of aging. But these aren’t the only reasons to make a conscious effort to think about your dog’s current well-being. You may also want to consider quality of life when your dog is dealing with these situations:
Chronic medical conditions
Kidney failure in dogs, liver disease in dogs, Cushing’s disease in dogs, seizures in dogs, osteoarthritis in dogs, dental disease in dogs, and other chronic diseases can take a toll on your dog over time.
Lifelong medications
Sometimes side effects or the need to try to convince your dog to take pills day in and day out can become overwhelming.
Need for certain interventions
Some dogs may need specialized care to meet their daily needs. For example, dogs who can’t or won’t eat on their own might need a feeding tube. While this is usually fairly non-invasive, it may impact quality of life for dogs who need tubes constantly replaced or repaired.
As another example, a paralyzed dog may need help moving from place to place or expressing his or her bladder. This can alter quality of life as well, especially if the dog previously enjoyed sleeping on the furniture, romping in the yard, or following someone from room to room.
Changes in hearing or sight
Many dogs who are blind and deaf adjust quite well to their condition. However, even if you do your best to communicate with your deaf dog or help your blind dog, these changes can be difficult for some dogs and may negatively impact quality of life.
Cancer treatments
Thankfully, radiation and chemotherapy do not typically affect dogs as severely as they do humans. However, it is still important to be mindful of your pet’s quality of life—both as a result of the treatments, and due to the cancer itself. Cancer can affect a dog’s energy, appetite, sleep schedule, and pain level.
Behavior changes
Canine cognitive dysfunction and the resulting signs of dementia in dogs can greatly impact your senior dog’s personality and confidence. Also, dogs who have severe phobias or separation anxiety may be in a great deal of mental pain, even if they are physically well.
This list is good starting point, but it isn’t comprehensive. When in doubt, talk to your veterinarian to see if he or she thinks you should be assessing your dog’s quality of life on a regular basis.
How do you use a quality-of-life scale for dogs?
If you determine that you need to assess your dog’s quality of life, a quality of life calculator or scale can be a helpful tool. Most are very user friendly. Typically, they include a list of questions about your dog’s daily life with either a ratings scale or yes/no check boxes.
6 tips for using quality of life scales for dogs
Here are six tips that can help you get the most benefit out of your dog’s quality of life assessment tool:
1. Know the benefits of using the same scale vs. mixing it up
Most of the time, once you find the quality of life scale that is right for you and your dog, it is best to stick with it. Using the same scale repeatedly gives you a baseline and a way to accurately compare results. Also, it means you will become familiar with the criteria. This allows you to unofficially evaluate your dog’s quality of life during your day-to-day interactions.
As a caveat to this, there are times when it can be beneficial to alternate quality of life scales or use multiple ones. That approach can help you get a fresh look at your pet’s quality of life. It may also help you see things that your original scale overlooked.
2. Work through the scale regularly.
Every scenario is different for every family, but I usually recommend working through the scale at least once a month initially. As your dog approaches the time when you might need to consider euthanasia, it can be beneficial to use the scale more often—perhaps every week or every day.
3. Evaluate a good day and a bad day to create a baseline.
In the beginning, it is helpful to use the scale on at least one “good day” and one “bad day.” This helps you know what a “good day” looks like for your dog. It can also be a helpful reminder of the things your dog is still enjoying in life, and what is really important to him or her.
On the flip side, having a baseline for “bad days” is also important. That way you have an idea of what it looks like when your dog starts declining.
4. Pick a time (or times) of day to complete the evaluation.
For accuracy, evaluate your dog’s quality of life at the same time of day. Sometimes a dog’s quality of life can vary throughout the day, which may skew the results. For example, if you assess your dog during his or her best time of day and then a week later evaluate during his or her worst time of day, your results will not be as accurate.
There are also times when it can be helpful to use the quality of life assessment scale several times in the same day—perhaps in the morning and again in the evening or at night. This gives you an understanding of how your dog’s quality of life may fluctuate throughout the day.
5. Involve your family and close friends in assessing your dog.
Are you unsure of how your dog is feeling? Concerned you might be missing clues as you observe your dog? You may want to consider asking a close family member or friend to answer a quality of life quiz for your dog. Also, a close friend may provide a more objective opinion.
Keep in mind that it is important to ask someone who knows your dog very well so they can answer the questions.
6. Enlist the help of your vet.
Any time you are unsure of your answers or want help working through a quality of life checklist for your dog, remember that your veterinarian is there to support you. Thinking about quality of life and contemplating when you may need to say goodbye is one of the most difficult decisions you may make on your dog’s behalf. Your veterinarian can be a compassionate and knowledgeable resource for you and your dog during this difficult time.
How do I find a good quality-of-life scale for dogs?
To find a good quality of life scale, don’t hesitate to reach out to your veterinarian. Not only is your veterinary team a great resource, some vets have a particular scale they recommend. Also, you may find a scale on your vet’s own website or social media. If you prefer a hard copy, you can give your vet’s office a call and ask to pick one up.
There are many quality of life quizzes online. Dog hospice, in-home euthanasia services, and veterinary school websites are all great places to find downloadable quality of life scales.
Additionally, you can use one of the scales I recommend:
HHHHHMM Quality of Life Scale
The HHHHHMM Quality of Life Scale (created by Alice Villalobos, DVM, DPNAP) is one of the most common scales. The five H’s stand for: Hurt, Hunger, Hydration, Hygiene, and Happiness. The two M’s stand for Mobility and More good days than bad. Each of these categories has a question that you score on a scale of 1 to 10. The total scale will help you determine if your dog’s quality of life is potentially declining.
OSU Quality of Life Scale
I also really like the Quality of Life Scale created by The Ohio State University Veterinary Medical Center. It is similar to the HHHHHMM scale but breaks those 7 broader categories into 25 more specific criteria that you rate individually on a scale of 1 to 5.
Both of these resources provide a dog quality of life scale pdf that you can easily print off and keep for your records. This allows you to look back at your answers from the previous weeks or months and compare them to your dog’s current score.
Calendar method
A simple and useful way to get a snapshot of your dog’s quality of life is to use a calendar. At the end of each day, decide if it was a “good day” or a “bad day” and write it down on the calendar. Using one color for “good” and another for “bad” can give you a nice visual representation of the days.
If you count up the marks and the bad days are becoming more frequent than the good, your dog’s quality of life might be declining.
DIY Quality of Life Scale
If you do not want to use one of the scales listed above, you also can create a basic scale for yourself. The easiest way to do this is to write down a list of activities that your dog loves to do. If you begin noticing that you start answering “no” when you ask yourself if your dog likes to do those same things, then it is possible that your dog’s quality of life is declining.
Finally, you may use my quality of life assessment below…
How does caretaker fatigue factor into quality of life evaluations?
One of the most important questions on the quality of life assessment above is this one: “Do you become frustrated or exhausted caring for your dog? This question is an important (but difficult) one to ask yourself. Caretaker fatigue is real, and it is relevant to a quality of life discussion. You need to be able to recognize when you start becoming impatient or resentful toward your dog.
No matter how much we love our dogs, caring for them during their senior years or after a terminal diagnosis is hard. This can be especially true in cases where dogs are having accidents or are sick regularly. It also can happen when dogs need assistance moving around and rely on your help for simple tasks, or when cognitive decline has changed their personality and behavior.
I know you love your dog and would do anything to help him or her. But I want you to know that it is okay and normal to become overwhelmed sometimes. If the challenges of caring for your dog are affecting your bond, talk with your veterinarian about ways to help you and help your dog.
What if you realize your dog’s quality of life is declining?
You should also talk to your veterinarian when, based on the quality of life scale results, you suspect your dog’s quality of life is declining. Your vet can help you interpret your dog’s quality of life questionnaire and also assess your dog. Usually this involves looking at how your dog is doing physically and asking you some questions regarding your dog’s behavior at home. The questions may be similar to those on the quality of life assessments.
With this information, your vet may make recommendations regarding how to proceed. Sometimes, there are ways to improve a dog’s quality of life again once it starts to decline. Depending on the situation, these recommendations could include:
- Adding in pain medications such as gabapentin for dogs, amantadine for dogs, or tramadol for dogs
- Trying out Dr. Buzby’s ToeGrips® dog nail grips or Dr. Buzby’s Encore Mobility™ hip and joint supplement to improve your dog’s mobility and comfort
- Changing your routines or modifying your at-home environment
- Trying a new medication or therapy for a chronic disease
- Giving appetite stimulants for dogs
- Other measures specific to your dog’s situation
Unfortunately, there may come a time when you’ve exhausted all the options. In this situation, you may have to start talking about preparing for your dog’s euthanasia or natural passing.
Saying goodbye
The hardest part of being blessed with a dog is the time when you have to say goodbye. No matter how long you have had with your dog, it is never going to be long enough. Many people express that losing a dog is harder than losing a friend. This is because dogs spend every day with us and become our best friends. Your dog is there for you no matter what.
If you are facing the difficult decision between dog hospice care or euthanasia, know that it is okay to not be sure how to proceed and to have a lot of questions. This is a very difficult time for you and your dog. Rely on family, friends, and your veterinarian (or a veterinarian who specializes in end-of-life care) to help you and your dog through this time.
You may also benefit from these articles:
- In-Home Dog Euthanasia: Heartfelt Answers to 12 FAQs
- Dog Euthanasia: Knowing When to Say Goodbye
- How Will You Know When It’s Time to Euthanize Your Dog? 5 Caring, Heartfelt Messages
- Grieving the Loss of a Dog After Euthanasia (& Finding Peace)
- Dementia in Dogs: When to Euthanize Your Beloved Senior Dog
Thinking about your dog’s quality of life is good but hard
As you consider your dog’s final days or months, a quality-of-life scale may give you clarity and direction. You know where your dog was. And you know where he or she is now. But I know it can be heartbreaking at the same time. Sometimes seeing those checks or adding up the score may make your sweet dog’s struggles all the more real.
Know that you are not alone in this. You have friends, family, and your veterinarian in your corner (and your dog’s corner). They are here to help you…be that by filling out a quality of life scale for your dog, offering solutions, or being a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on.
Are you considering your dog’s quality of life?
Please share your story below. We can all support each other.
My husky/lab is 8 and was recently diagnosed with arthritis. he still enjoys walks and playing although they make him tired quickly, he has become snappy at our other dog and not wanting him around at all, he pants and sleeps a majority of the day. I cant help but feel that hes in pain and unhappy but part of me feels like he is still too long to think of is quality of life going down. I want him around but i dont want him in pain.
Hi Jessica,
I understand your concern for your boy and think he is lucky to have you advocating for his health and well-being. After he received the arthritis diagnosis, did your vet prescribe any pain medications or anti-inflammatories? If not, these would be a great place to start. There are SO MANY options for arthritis pain management (even some that are not medications!). It does sound like your pup is painful and unhappy. If his pain cannot be managed, then saying goodbye may be the most loving option. I will attach links to other articles with more information about how to offer relief from arthritis pain. Hoping you can find a solution for your sweet guy. Wishing you both comfort and peace.
1. How to Relieve Arthritis Pain in Dogs: The Ultimate Guide
2. Dog Arthritis Treatment: 8 Ways to Help a Senior Dog at Home
3. Natural Pain Relief for Dogs: 13 Methods
4. Adequan for Dogs: Don’t Just Treat Arthritis, Slow it Down
hi.
My 11 year old gsd is struggling to walk now. She has arthritis in her rear legs .She struggles to get into the car, and is unable to jump up on to the sofa. She seems to be struggling to stand up from a sitting position and from laying down.
She has detached herself from the general life in the house and prefers to be alone. She sleeps a lot more than ever before.
I am really struggling to make the best decision for her.
Dear Gerard,
I am sorry your senior girl is struggling, and her quality of life is declining. It is ok to say goodbye before all joy is lost and the only thing that remains is pain. I always think it is better to let go one day too early than one day too late and allow unnecessary suffering. I will attach links to other articles with more advice on how to make this emotional decision and great comments from other readers too. Praying for clarity and strength. Bless you and your sweet girl.
1. When to Euthanize a Dog With Arthritis: A Vet’s Heartfelt Advice
2. How Will You Know When It’s Time to Euthanize Your Dog? 5 Caring, Heartfelt Messages
3. Preparing for Your Dog’s Euthanasia: 10 Thoughts for Peace
My 12 year old fox terrier was diagnosed with Cushings disease almost 2 years ago. He also became completely blind November last year which he seemed to adjust well too. He has always loved his food even before the cushings diagnosis but of course with Cushings that is a major symptom even with medication. I am now struggling as whether or not to euthanise my little boy.
He is now showing symptoms of late stages of Cushings. With excessive drinking and urination. Unsteady on his feet, unsettle nights and visible body wasting but having said that, he is still happy when my partner and I come home, wagging his tail and he is still very much aware.
I don’t want to sound selfish but I am struggling so much as I love my little fellow so much. My children and I picked him out at a pet store as a tiny little puppy. when my own children were still young and living at home. He really is my best friend. So how do I make this decision. I know I have to but how : (
Dear Katarina,
I am sorry your senior guy is struggling, and his health is starting to decline. I understand how conflicted you must feel and know what an emotional decision this can be. Sometimes letting go is the most loving option and only way to offer peace and rest. I would rather say goodbye one day too early than one day too late and allow unnecessary suffering. I will attach links to other articles with more information and great advice from other readers as well. Praying you will know when it is time and wishing you and your family strength and comfort.
1. When To Euthanize A Dog With Cushing’s Disease: A Vet’s Advice
2. How Will You Know When It’s Time to Euthanize Your Dog? 5 Caring, Heartfelt Messages
Our two year old golden retriever was recently diagnosed with an intrahepatic liver shunt. As a young puppy, he also had HOD (hypertrophic osteodystrophy). We think some of the symptoms we thought were HOD-related were probably also due to the liver shunt.
We and our vet agree he is not a strong candidate for surgery (based on CT scan and health history) and we follow a strict liver protocol with diet and medications. It is incredibly difficult to gauge his quality of life. He has happy moments throughout the day, but he also sleeps more hours per day than our 13 year old golden mix, and his appetite is decreasing. We often have to coax him to walk (but then he enjoys seeing people) and meal times are stressful, as we try one topping after another to encourage him to eat his prescription, low protein food. Last week, he came down with double ear infections (yeast) and an infection on his neck that is not healing well. We’re starting to feel exhausted. We keep a yellow / red / green day calendar but still feel like we need more guidance. For sure, we don’t want him to become as sick (with hepatic encephalopathy) as he was when first diagnosed. But figuring out his quality of life is so very hard… He has an amazing, loving temperament.
Dear Christine,
My heart aches for you as you try to navigate this difficult path with your young Golden. I understand how hard it can be to adequately evaluate quality of life when it seems to change so dramatically from day to day (or even hour to hour). I think your colored calendar is a great idea. Also, it might be helpful to talk with an integrative vet in your area or one that specializes in Traditional Chinese Medicine. They may have ideas about supplements or herbal therapies that could help maintain your boy’s health and well-being. Ultimately, you know your boy better than anyone and you have to trust your intuition. I would rather let go one day too early than one day too late and allow unnecessary suffering. It is ok to say goodbye before all joy is lost and the only thing that remains is pain and struggling. When a dog has reached the end of their life, they enter a window of time where saying goodbye is a loving option but may not necessarily be urgent. Without examining your pup myself, I can’t say if he has entered his window or not, but your vet should be able to weigh in on this situation and offer guidance. Hoping you can find the answers you need to feel confident with how to proceed. Also, make sure you are taking care of yourself. Your quality of life matters too and caregiver fatigue is a very real thing. Here is a link to another article with more information: When Caring For A Sick Pet Becomes Too Much: Pet Caregiver Fatigue
Praying for comfort and peace for everyone involved. Bless you and your sweet boy.
I am considering whether to euthanize or get surgery for laryngeal paralysis on my 12 year old Golden Retriever. I’ve managed it for a year, but she is going downhill. She has some autoimmune issues that are undercontrol with meds, she has done well for about 8 months on that front. But breathing has taken a sharp turn, she can’t do anything much but lay around. She still goes for half mile walk, sometimes breaks into a brief run and rolls in grass, still eats well, still greets me at the doors, does stairs well. Occasionally has a stumble, but legs are overall ok. If surgery would help, I would do it, but don’t want to do it and make her life worse, with recovery and risk of aspiration, which vet says the risk is there now anyway. Her joy is eating, and I know that will be harder after surgery, so wondering what is the right thing. Do you think tieback surgery would be worth the risk? I have studied it extensively and watched several videos. I would be going to a board certified surgeon recommended from someone local who did it for her dog.
Hi Lisa,
I understand your concern for your Golden and can see why you are conflicted about how to proceed. Honestly, I have had several clients with senior dogs pursue tie back surgery and the dogs have done wonderfully. Puzzle bowls and mats are a great way to help them slow down when eating to try and minimize the risk of aspiration. You can also experiment with the consistency of the food to see what is easiest for your girl (some do better with canned food rolled into small meat balls while others handle dry food well). I will attach links to articles with more information just in case you happen to come across a bit of advice you haven’t seen during your research. There are also great comments from other readers that have faced this same difficult choice for their pups. I am not sure there is a definite right or wrong way to handle this issue and think you should trust your intuition as you know your girl better than anyone. Praying for strength and a clear path forward. Bless you and your sweet girl.
1. Laryngeal Paralysis in Dogs: The Ultimate Guide
2. Tie Back Surgery for Dogs with Laryngeal Paralysis
3. Doxepin & Non-Surgical Management of Canine Laryngeal Paralysis
My Maltese just. turned 17, I have had her since I was 17. She wears a diaper that I have to change 5+ times a day. She poops in the house and now in her sleep on my bed sometimes. She has TERRIBLE separation anxiety and will bark for 5+ hours if left alone without stopping. I have to pay for doggy daycare daily when I go to work or out with friends so she doesn’t disturb my neighbors. When we are home she is constantly anxious and begging for food. I give her trazadone every night to sleep. She wakes up around 1AM and 4 Am every night to pee on balcony (I am very tired). She also has stage 4 periodontal disease and random bouts of pancreatitis every 3/4 months. Although above seems like a lot, she looks like she’s 7 years old and loves her long walks more than anything and still loves me (but doesn’t really care for other people anymore). She has slight arthritis in her back legs but acupuncture has helped. She can’t climb up or down stairs, but she runs down the hall like a puppy occasionally. She loves to eat and loves treats. She is a very picky easter and I have to mix chicken in with her food and she goes crazy. She gets so excited and runs around like a puppy and plays when teasing her with treats, but she doesn’t play otherwise. During the day she whines excessively scratching pantry where treats are and paces the whole day until she tires herself. When I am with her she seems to be fine, but I don’t have a life anymore. None of my family will watch her anymore as it’s so much work. When I leave her alone she barks and pees and poops all over the house and paces nonstop. I love her more than anyone on this planet and I don’t know what to do. Am I selfishly keeping her alive? Is she suffering? The only time she keeps content is laying in bed across from me. I seem to think she’s fine but my friends and family think it’s time. I don’t know if they just see her as a burden or her truly suffering. What do I do?
Hi Marie,
My heart goes out to you as you try to navigate this difficult path. I am so sorry you are feeling alone in this hard stage of life, and it is starting to affect your well-being. Without examining your girl myself, I can’t make specific conclusions about her situation or if saying goodbye is the best choice. Even if she has entered her “window of time” where letting go is acceptable, it doesn’t mean it is necessarily urgent. I will attach links to other articles with more information and great advice from other readers. Ultimately you have to trust your intuition as you know your girl better than anyone. Praying for your strength and comfort. Bless you and your pup.
1. When Caring For A Sick Pet Becomes Too Much: Pet Caregiver Fatigue
2. Dementia in Dogs: When to Euthanize Your Beloved Senior Dog
3. How Will You Know When It’s Time to Euthanize Your Dog? 5 Caring, Heartfelt Messages
We just euthanized our 15 year old mini poodle and I have been overwhelmed with guilt since then. He lost his sight completely almost two years ago due to cataracts, one eye had shrunk so much from trauma the cataract caused, he couldn’t manage the eye secretions and I had to frequently clean his eye otherwise it would mat shut from thick drainage. The blindness seemed to slowly take the life out of him. He no longer wanted to go on walks, play with his toys. His only joy was food and his daily treat. He had been having frequent urinary accidents in the house, he was diapered for almost a year but then he started having bowel incontinence, accidents almost daily despite taking him out frequently. We also noticed frequent panting, loud breathing especially at night, wouldn’t climb stairs anymore. I felt I was keeping my buddy around just for my comfort. But the guilt now is just awful, I feel like I gave up on him. I hope this is just part of the grieving process, time heals all. I miss him so much.
Dear Jessica,
I am sorry for the recent loss of your beloved pup. You are right that the guilt is just part of the grieving process, but I wish I could spare you from it. From what you describe, letting go was the most loving option and only way to offer your boy freedom from pain and suffering. I commend you for having the strength to allow your own heart to break so your sweet boy could find peace and rest. I hope as time passes your heart will begin to heal. May his memory stay with you always and be a blessing in your life.
My Roscoe, a rescue who I’m pretty positive is black mouth or some similar cur, is 15.5 yrs and while I believe he’s not ready yet, I do worry that he will suffer because I can’t let go. I’ve had him since he was a couple months old and he is the only real commitment I’ve ever made in my life. He does have a laundry list of issues but I don’t think he’s completely miserable. He’s mostly blind (light sensitive but I bought him sunglasses for outside and they’ve been working great), can’t hear much and has pretty bad arthritis and joint pain (he takes 3 300mg gabapentin 3x daily, 75mg Rimadyl and dasequin chews twice a day with meals), he occasionally won’t eat but it’s rare and doesn’t last long.. He has had vestibular disease twice and his balance is pretty horrible. We walk down the block and around the corner twice a day with a couple bathroom breaks just outside too. He has a very hard time getting up by himself and I usually help. I have put rugs inside and when we walk he wears a harness so I can help with his balance and carry a little of the weight, I also built a ramp over the stairs that lead inside so I can help him up. He sometimes pees inside and has started occasionally poops in the bed, which I don’t think he realizes most of the time (I use dog wraps and pads underneath him in bed) He still gets up to follow or look for me if i walk away for more than a few mins As far as I know he is otherwise healthy (we are due for a vet visit). He doesn’t do much but lay in bed or follow me if I’m moving around. He will play with toys now and then but he doesn’t immediately destroy them like he used to. So idk, I don’t think it’s time, even with all his ailments, and the few people we see daily, namely my neighbors seem to agree that he’s not ready. Curious what you make of all this?
Hi Liz,
I understand your concern for Roscoe and think it is great you continue to advocate for his health and well-being. It sounds like he is dealing with a lot of issues and his quality of life may be declining. But without personally examining him or witnessing his daily routine, it is hard to make specific conclusions. When I think about making end of life decisions, I like to describe this period as a “window of time”. Once a dog enters their window, it is ok to say goodbye at any time, but it may not necessarily be urgent. I feel as though Roscoe has probably just begun to enter his window. This is where you have to use your intuition as you know him better than anyone. It is ok to let go before all joy is lost and the only thing that remains is pain and suffering. I pray for your strength and clarity and wish you both comfort and peace. Bless you as you navigate this emotional path.
We adopted our sweet German Shepherd Greer in 2021 when we found him on the side of the road. We believe he is about 11.5 and purebred but it’s hard to tell. He’s had two cancers and a slew of other health issues from previous neglect and abuse, but the arthritis is by far the worse. He is currently on Galliprant for the arthritis and Trazodone for the anxiety. He also takes vitamins and other supplements.
He can’t walk without us, can’t hold his pee or poop for long, is extremely anxious (and we assume in pain), and gets very defensive and somewhat aggressive if he is physically handled. He is afraid of men to a certain extent so I have to be the one to carry him and deal with him most of the time He bites my partner often and has bitten me on accident quite a bit.
I won’t lie, our quality of life as his parents has been rough since he started taking a turn for the worse in November 2023. It’s hard for us to live our lives to the fullest. But his appetite is healthy, he loves being around his family, and seems like he’s very happy other than whatever discomfort he feels from arthritis. I want to believe he will show clearer signs of being ready to pass, and can’t think of him passing when he seems so alert otherwise. But I’m not sure if I’m projecting from a human perspective or if I need to be more realistic.
I’ve only had to elect for euthanasia when dogs are severely sick or injured, never like this. I don’t think I need to make a decision at this moment, but I’m extremely nervous and sad for what the remainder of the year will hold.
Dear Lauren,
I am sorry you are facing this difficult situation with Greer. From what you describe I am suspicious that some of his behavioral issues may be due to dementia or cognitive dysfunction. I understand how hard it can be to truly evaluate quality of life and know when is best to let go. I will attach links to other articles with more information and great advice from other readers. Please make sure you are taking care of yourself. I know you would do anything for your boy, but your quality of life matters too! Wishing you all the best as you navigate this emotional path ahead. Praying for comfort and peace for everyone involved including your sweet boy. ♥
1. Dementia in Dogs: When to Euthanize Your Beloved Senior Dog
2. When Caring For A Sick Pet Becomes Too Much: Pet Caregiver Fatigue
3. How Will You Know When It’s Time to Euthanize Your Dog? 5 Caring, Heartfelt Messages
4. Preparing for Your Dog’s Euthanasia: 10 Thoughts for Peace
We have a 14 year old black lab, Mallory who I fear is at the end of her days. Her eyes are cloudy and she seems to have lost her hearing. She wanders in circles in the evening and sleeps most of the day 20 to 21 hours. Recently she is both peeing and pooping in the house multiple times a day and seems anxious when I am not around. I am struggling with letting her go but don’t want her in pain. She struggles to get up and her back legs seem to be failing. Advice? I ask myself if I am being selfish for not letting her go.
Dear Tricia,
My heart aches for you as you face this difficult decision for Mallory. It does sound like she is nearing the end of her life and sometimes letting go is the most loving option. Many of the symptoms you describe sound like canine cognitive dysfunction or what we call dog dementia. I will attach links to other articles with more information and great advice from other readers as well. Please know that it is ok to say goodbye before all joy is lost and the only thing that remains is pain and suffering. We talk about giving a beloved dog a good life, but a peaceful goodbye is just as important. I am praying for clarity and strength as you navigate this emotional path. Bless you and your sweet girl. ♥
1. Canine Cognitive Dysfunction in Dogs: Signs, Symptoms, Solutions
2. Dementia in Dogs: When to Euthanize Your Beloved Senior Dog
3. How Will You Know When It’s Time to Euthanize Your Dog? 5 Caring, Heartfelt Messages
I’m sorry…
I just commented on my 13, almost 14 yr lab, Otis.
I forgot to mention he is panting a lot now, and I just read that’s an indicator of pain, but he’s.not aggressive, and his expression is usually soft & happy, like he’s not in pain.
Again, questioning everything.
My sweet lab will be 14 on March 15, his agreed upon birthday; we rescued him at 8 wks from the pound, 36 hrs before he was to be euthanized. He is my shadow.
Part of me thinks he’s hung on to help me go through radiation for an unresectable benign brain tumor that’s in a bad spot.
He’s had surgery for sarcoma twice, big one on 2/14/20, & the cancer came back in 2022.
He is still eating, drinking, only an occasional poo in his bed in am…like he stretches, and it pops out. Poor guy.
We did a QOL ck w/vet in Nov. & agreed he still had strong will to live….not time yet.
The tumor in his groin area is quite large, but it doesn’t impact his ability to void/defecate and didn’t impact walking until it recently spread to his back leg. We now feel the same type of tumor on his shoulder.
He is on 500mg gabapentin am & 600 mg pm with monthly librela shots the past 2 months.
In addition to eating/drinking, he still wants to go on super slow walks (0.2 mi)…mainly to sniff, but he gave up and laid down on one last Thurs. so we now walk 0.1 miles.
He sleeps a ton during day & has a hard time getting up now. Hes gotten stuck where he can’t get himself up a few times (back end weak & wood floors). I’ve put rugs wherever I feasibly can for him.
I’m terrified he’ll get stuck in a spot and can’t get up when we’re not home, or worse: get stuck trying to walk through dog door.
He’s had a cough for about 6 mos…..vet thinks more gastro, so he’s on famotidine am & pm, but I think the cough has worsened over past month.
His bed is on floor by me & he usually moves a lot during sleep & coughs sometimes, lately I’ve awakened to some panting. When he does sleep quietly through the night, I startle awake to see if he’s still breathing, (like when your human child sleeps through the night for the first time…that kind of panic). That said, I haven’t slept well for a while now.
He’s started yelping while he’s on his bed in the living room & I’m in another room with gate closed, virtual appts, etc) and stops when I come to him. He doesn’t do this for hubs or daughter, and we don’t think it’s pain since he stops when he sees me/realizes I’m in room.
Dementia, anxiety??
I’ve taken 3 QOL assessments:
This one: 6-9 yes (some in middle) & 4 no.
Ohio State: 81/135, so 60%
Lap of Love: 17-18
I’ve had to euthanize 3 dogs in my adult life, and all 3 were clear cut.
Otis has been by far the hardest decision to make. We’ve already rescheduled twice, and I believe we’re going to go through w/it Tues/Wed next week. 🙁
My hubs & daughter are on fence, but they’ve given me final say, since Otis is my baby, (we have 3 & ea has their human).
Since I had to retire early, I’m home w/him more, as well, and I see it all, daily, so they know I have a better idea of how he really is
5 min after I made decision, for next week, he grabbed a toy and played w/it for first time in weeks. I jingle the leash and he wanted to walk. He still sometimes meets me at the door. It breaks my heart to think he’s suffering and let it continue and breaks my heart to give up on him too soon…it feels selfish, like I’m doing it for sleep or the ability to leave the house. I can’t stop second-guessing….and crying.
Dear Melissa,
My heart aches for you as you face this difficult decision for your beloved Otis. I know you don’t want to give up too early and would never consider euthanasia out of convenience, but that is not how I see this situation. From what you describe, Otis is struggling, and the bad days do seem to outnumber the good. It is ok to say goodbye before all joy is lost and the only thing that remains is pain. I always think it is better to let go one day too early rather than one day too late and allow unnecessary suffering. Ultimately, you have to go with your intuition. As you said, you know him better than anyone. I encourage you to make the most of these final days. Spoil him rotten and enjoy every moment you are gifted. Praying for your strength and comfort as you navigate this emotional path. Bless you and your sweet boy. ♥
Our families dachshund Bella Rose would have been 17 in April, slowly we’ve all seen her decrease and decline. From becoming deaf, doggy dementia getting worse, and cataracts to just name a few. She slept 22-23 hours a day, at times would barely wake up to eat potty and lay back down. She had a heart murmur that was rated about a 5 at her last appointment, and had lost a pound in 8 months. We took her in for a quality of life exam tonight, one our family has dreaded, but discussed with our children. We explained we need to stop being selfish, we don’t want her to go she’s our girl, but she’s suffering. She’s living just to do that live to be our companion. She no longer could walk down a stair to go outside on her own, she used to love just being outside and wondering. She wasn’t “enjoying” life. Her limbs and arthritis were just getting worse. The vet said they could give her medicine to help, but that isn’t guaranteed. Possible we would end up back at vet in a few months. Her eyes looked tired, she would wonder off into a room and just stare at wall. We made the family decision to let her go. I’m still struggling, I know it was right but I wish I could know for sure. I’ve been balling all night, and feeling guilty. They gave her a sedative prior to injection, she was sleeping and unresponsive 1 minute after. She went peacefully, she will be greatly missed. I just wish there was a way to know..: they understood and we made the right decision! 💔
Dear Rachel,
My heart aches for you with your recent loss of Bella Rose. From what you described; I am certain you made the most loving choice. It is clear your girl was an important part of your family, and I am sure she knew how much you loved her. What a blessing her passing was peaceful, and you were able to be by her side in those final moments. I hope with time the grief you are all feeling will turn to peace. May Bella Rose’s memory stay with you always and continue to be a source of joy in your lives.
My dog Nallie is a 16 yr old JRT going on 17yrs old. This last year has been quite difficult. In the beginning of the year she was attacked by a neighbor dog that slipped through a hole in the fence. She had gotten shaken pretty hard before I knew what was happening and could break it up. She recovered but while she was being treated we found some other underlying issues. She has always had a heart murmur since she was born, it was so slight sometimes a DVM couldn’t even hear it. Come to find out it had jumped to a 3-4/6 heart murmur. I put off seeing a cardiologist due to she wasn’t showing any symptoms or having any issues. A month later she experienced a syncope episode when we were moving apartments, I had never experienced one before and honestly thought she had died. She eventually woke up and we saw the cardiologist not long after. She got put on heart medications. Haven’t had an issue since and her 6 month check up looked great. Then a couple months after the heart issue was diagnosis she came down with a UTI and we found crystals. Xrays were done to make sure she had no bladder stones but we ended up finding kidney stones instead. Changed her to a urinary diet, it dissolved the crystals but she will still get chronic UTIs. due to the kidney stones. She also started having some urinary issues that I thought were due to urinary incontinence. She got placed on Incurin and it helped for many months. Now the last several weeks she has been urinating sporadically in the house. Sometimes she whines to be let out but sometimes I think its cognative and doesn’t realize she is in the house. She can’t hold it while I am at work all day like she use to, I have had to start crating her. Ive been speaking with her vet and we are trying a couple of different things but I am afraid that if nothing works it might be time, I have had her for more than half my life and I feel like I won’t know when the right time is. I don’t want to do it to early but I don’t want to wait to long either and have her suffer. She is overall still doing okay, it is just the continue urinating in the house that is the issue. I feel so guilty having these thoughts because it is more of an inconvenience to me and I hate thinking of it like that. I also know its not fair to me emotionally because I feel like it is all I think about now.
She also has a hx of hypothyroidism for the last couple of years but it is well managed with meds.
Dear Jamie,
My heart goes out to you as you face this difficult situation with Nallie. It sounds like you are doing everything you can, and it is ok to NOT be ok. Please don’t feel guilty. Caregiving is hard and emotional and can be a heavy burden even if done out of love. If the main point of stress is the accidents in the house, I encourage you to give diapers a try. You can still let Nallie out at regular intervals when you are home, but for the times that you are away or asleep, diapers could offer a much-needed break from the constant cleaning. I will attach links to other articles with more information. Praying for your strength and clarity when making tough decisions. Wishing you all the best. Bless you and your sweet girl. ♥
1. When Caring For A Sick Pet Becomes Too Much: Pet Caregiver Fatigue
2. Dementia in Dogs: When to Euthanize Your Beloved Senior Dog
3. Preparing for Your Dog’s Euthanasia: 10 Thoughts for Peace
hi. my 15 year old staff is almost completely blind and deaf. shebumps into things and has no interest in going out or playing anymore. she has a heart murmur and coughs and pants a lot. she also has dementia. However, she still eats and drinks, and is happy to see familiar people. she has started pooping in the house which the vet says will get worse. I do not want her to be suffering, but at the same time I,m not sure if its time for me to make the horrible decision of putting her to sleep. She sleeps almost all day and wonders around in the evenings. I want what is best for lexi, but I really am unsure.
Hi Kerry,
I understand your concern for your senior girl and agree it can be hard to know when it is time to say goodbye. As a dog’s life nears the end, there is a window of time where euthanasia can be a good choice. Your girl may have just entered her window. So, while it is ok to consider letting go, it is also probably ok to wait a while longer if that is what you prefer. Ultimately you have to go with your intuition. You know your pup better than anyone. I highly recommend you use the links at the bottom of the article to read through some of the other articles on our site. Here are some I recommend for your specific situation:
1. Dementia in Dogs: When to Euthanize Your Beloved Senior Dog
2. How Will You Know When It’s Time to Euthanize Your Dog? 5 Caring, Heartfelt Messages
3. Preparing for Your Dog’s Euthanasia: 10 Thoughts for Peace
Praying for clarity as you navigate this difficult path. Bless you and your sweet girl.
I have a 10 year old newfoundland mix. He has arthritis in his back knees and hips and likely back. we got a puppy 6 months ago. at first they played and he set boundaries which was expected and worked well. He has severe bad breath but always had good teeth. we started using mouth wash spray to help with his breath. it’s improved but now I just discovered this week he has rotten molars. I have to get him to the vet but my husband says we can’t spend the 1-2k for the tooth extraction on a senior dog. He is on daily CBD for joint pain for the last 2 years or so. he has a limp some days, other days he is just stiff and slow to get up. once he is up he runs for a few minutes. He still greets us when we come home but otherwise spends all his day sleeping. the last few weeks he has become aggressive to the other dog even if he comes anywhere near him or walks too close. He eats and drinks well, But less then he used too, I guess I am trying to convince my spouse do the dental extraction. But he feels his quality of life is limited anyways.
Dear Eden,
My heart goes out to you as you face this difficult situation with your senior boy. I understand your husband’s concerns and your want to try and give your big guy some relief. I wish I had the answer and could tell you what was best. I will attach links to other articles with more information. Hoping you can find the advice you need to navigate this tough path. Wishing you all the best. ♥
1. Senior Dog Tooth Extraction: What to Expect
2. Is My Dog Too Old For Anesthesia?
3. Is My Dog Too Old for Surgery?
My husband and I have never had a dog before until our dear Maggie. She is 15 1/2 years old and has always loved to go for walks, chase squirrels, go for drives and travel. She loves to be at home at night, too, in our bed, but loves to go. In the last 8 months, she has lost her hearing and the sight in one eye and the other eye is going as well. She flinches now anytime the sun shines or anything moves near her face, so we are careful when we reach for her. She sleeps 18-20 hours a day. She has had a bad back leg for several years but in the last 3-4 months it has gotten progressively worse and we have worked with a wonderful vet who has prescribed everything possible – anti inflammatories, steroid injection, new arthritis injections, red light laser therapy, nothing is working completely. In the midst of all this, she has become much less mobile, limps everyday and doesn’t put full weight on her leg and sometimes holds the leg completely up to her abdomen. She then of course has difficulty going out to the bathroom so we carry her in and out because she can’t navigate the smallest of steps. She can’t get up on any furniture, so she now sleeps on the floor on her bed or on her blanket. At night, she still sleeps with us in bed, but the ramp we built her a year ago, she can no longer use to get up. She is up at night pacing like crazy and goes down the ramp which terrifies us to death so we jump up alarmed in the middle of sleeping, fearing she’s hurting her leg more. She starts at 3:00 a.m. and goes out and is awake wanting to eat much more than usual, and this continues for hours until 7 a.m. when she falls back asleep and sleeps most of the day, except for wanting to eat, drink and a few potty breaks. We wonder if there is a dementia issue a bit because of her nightly behavior, but can’t verify. Her bloodwork all comes back fine, but hasn’t been done in a few months. She is covered, including her anus, in large cyst like bumps. She is very anxious most times we get in the car or try to go for a ride. We have a dog stroller and we try to take her in that so she can get outside a bit, but the vehicle seems uncomfortable on her leg after about 30 minutes even though she is in her cushioned seat. We are both wearing out because she goes to the bathroom on the floor daily, mostly pee, but that has become worse because she limps around as she is urinating due to the bad leg not being down to help stabilize her. She is up every night at 3 a.m and never goes back to bed. But, we look at her and say she seems to navigate ok on 3 legs for the most part, she is eating WAY more than normal and drinking alot, which makes us wonder about dementia (which her little brother had), and she loves to be loved by us and be with us and is excited to see us when we come home (once she realizes we are here because she is usually sound asleep and can’t hear us come in). I guess we are in that we don’t know if it’s time for her, or not because we see her moving and excited to have her food daily, but then again, she isn’t seemingly having a good quality of life or certainly not as good as what she did have. The veg suggests she can hobble around on 3 legs and be just fine, but also says there is nothing else he can do for medically. He hasn’t suggest euthanization and actually when asked he says no the leg doesn’t mean there is a need for that since she is eating well and old dogs sleep so that’s no big deal. Could you please give us your 2 cents and any one else that has owned dogs and has any suggestions? Thanks for your help. We are both in our 60’s and we love our girl so very much. She has had a wonderful life and lots and lots of love, and we are so very thankful to have been given the opportunity to love her and have her be part of our family.
Dear Alexis,
Goodness, this is such a difficult situation. I am so sorry you are living with this burden of love. From what you described; I am 100% positive Maggie has dementia/cognitive dysfunction. You listed almost every symptom there is for dementia and checked all the boxes on the checklist. The cruel part of this disease is most of the problem is mental and not physical. But I am convinced that mental disease causes just as much suffering, if not more, than physical disease. When evaluating quality of life, we try to look at the whole picture. It takes more than a willingness to eat and walk around to make a life worth living. I do think it would be an acceptable and loving choice to say goodbye to your sweet girl. I will attach links to other articles with more information and great advice from other readers as well. Praying for clarity and comfort and wishing you all peace as you navigate this difficult path.
1. Dementia in Dogs: When to Euthanize Your Beloved Senior Dog
2. When Caring For A Sick Pet Becomes Too Much: Pet Caregiver Fatigue
3. How Will You Know When It’s Time to Euthanize Your Dog? 5 Caring, Heartfelt Messages
4. Preparing for Your Dog’s Euthanasia: 10 Thoughts for Peace
Hello
My Staffordshire bull terrier Charlie is 10 going on 11 years, since a pup he has always had a weak rear leg, he has also always been grumpy and as he grew, with certain people and my 2 female dogs, he would show signs of aggression and dominance. He was diagnosed with a luxating patella some years ago and pronounced hip dysplasia, the bad leg has now an awful gait , he is on pain relief, but has deteriorated considerably this year. He no longer wants to go for his short walk, he wants to attack every dog/cat outside, attack certain family members that try to help him, sleeps a lot, and when he is not asleep he is grumbly, does not want to be touched or helped, yesterday he actually couldn’t move his rear end at all and could only raise himself via two front legs, when I saw this I felt so much guilt for allowing him to reach this stage, I phoned my vet today and I have booked him in for an eternal sleep. I am still torn between do or don’t at the moment, on one hand, I look at his quality of life, it’s no longer there, the aggression has increased and he is not happy in life, his mobility is very poor 5 out of 7 days, no longer wants to go the park (very short walk), pants terribly 2 minutes into the walk if I make him go, (I do this to promote his mental health and well-being) and is not happy when we get back, on the other hand, when we have a good day, he’s back to being Charlie although can still be aggressive. Us as owners seem to know when the time is right but we still question ourselves and reach out to others for confirmation. I have been through this twice before and the decision doesn’t get any easier, I lost one of my females in April. I really don’t want to keep Charlie alive on pain relief knowing that I will still have to make the decision when the medication stops working, I like to believe that I am making the right decision and I am acting in the best interest of my boy , I wish you all the very best with your furkids
Dear Jenny,
I am so sorry you are facing this emotional decision for Charlie. It sounds like you have done everything in your power to keep him happy and enjoying life for as long as possible. I know saying goodbye is heart breaking, but it is a selfless act of love that will give your sweet boy peace and freedom from suffering. Hoping Charlie’s passing will be smooth and peaceful. Wishing you comfort and strength.
Hello
We have a 10 year old Labrador who was diagnosed with osteoarthritis about two years ago. She has a severe front leg limp with her elbow turned out- this is where it started. She’s been on 50mg a day of deramaxx for the last year but she doesn’t go out as much as she used to and she sleeps more now. She pants a lot more and struggles to move even with the medication. Just when I think maybe it’s time she has a good day where she has a little more energy and her tail is always wagging when we call her name. Im just not sure if we should wait? She still eats, drinks and goes potty outside. She does have days though where she doesn’t touch her food at all.
Dear Kristine,
I understand your concern for your senior Lab. It does sound like she is struggling with pain and discomfort. Is Deramaxx the only medication she is taking at this time? The reason I ask is this is a great treatment for arthritis pain, but you may get better results when combined with other therapies. Once arthritis progresses and becomes more advanced, many vets will add on other things such as joint supplements, gabapentin, tramadol, adequan injections, or even laser therapy. I will attach links to other articles with more information. Of course, all treatments will eventually become less effective, and you will be faced with when to say goodbye. Your vet can help you navigate that difficult path as well. Hoping you find the answers you are looking for and wishing you and your sweet girl the best. ♥
1. How to Relieve Arthritis Pain in Dogs: The Ultimate Guide
2. Dog Arthritis Treatment: 8 Ways to Help a Senior Dog at Home
3. Natural Pain Relief for Dogs: 13 Methods
4. When to Euthanize a Dog With Arthritis: A Vet’s Heartfelt Advice
hello. I have a 13 year old great Pyrenees/Bernese mountain dog mix (95 lb). this week is now unable to get up from a laying down position, his back legs are not working right. therefore, he cannot get up to drink water so we put it next to him but when we’re not here we don’t know if he is drinking much (we have full time jobs). he’s on the max dosage of gabapentin and rimydal. besides his mobility, he’s 100% healthy- blood and fecal tests are good and heart is good. he eats and drinking good. we have slings to help him get up to go to the bathroom, and after walking a little bit his muscles loosen up and he can walk on his own, although very shaky. I know for his size he is very old. but since his mind is there, he seems happy, and besides his legs he’s healthy I do not think he needs euthanasia. but then I wonder if I’m saying that for me or for him. I’ve had him for 13 years so everyone is supporting me but idk if my decision is correct.
Dear Jill,
I am sorry your big guy has lost his mobility and you are in this difficult situation. It is hard for me to make specific conclusions about your dog’s quality of life without examining him myself. I will say that even though he is eating, and his blood work is normal, I worry about his mental health. I cannot imagine how hard it must be for him to be unable to walk or move around on his own and do the things that would normally bring him joy. I am not sure that daily meals and bathroom trips outside are enough to equal a good quality of life. I always think it is better to say goodbye one day too early rather than one day too late and allow unnecessary suffering. Sometimes saying goodbye and allowing our own hearts to break is the only way to give a beloved pup peace and freedom. I don’t know that there is truly a right or wrong answer for your specific situation. I just hope you can find the answers and advice you need to make a decision you can be at peace with and figure out what is best for you and your senior guy. Bless you.
I have been struggling with a similar situation. our girl who is turning 12 next month has always been very healthy and active. Her favorite thing being running and hiking and greeting is with a toy in her mouth, which she was doing up until about a month and a half ago when she started showing decline. We found she has a tumor growing on her spine and we are unsure of what type of cancer it is since it’s not a good place to biopsy. After many scans and images and seeing the rest of her was very healthy still, we decided to do radiation which over weeks causes more inflammation making symptoms seem worse. She has lost complete mobility of her back legs and cannot stand or walk on her own. Her eating and drinking is just fine but she has been just sleeping and going out for potty breaks while we wait to see how the treatment has affected her. This is breaking my heart. We are in limbo with the hopes of it helping her swelling and inflammation for her to gain a little bit more mobility for a comfortable remainder. but at this point I know she’s sad and depressed and doesn’t understand why she can’t move the way she used to and her demeanor has changed. She doesn’t quite acknowledge us in the ways she used to. I’m having a hard time even getting a kiss from her and it’s breaking my heart. I’m wondering if this is around the point that we should decide to let her go or if we should give it a little more time to see if the inflammation goes down and the radiation helped to get her back to a few things she loves to do. I’m heartbroken for her.
Dear Janice,
This is such a tough situation and my heart aches for you. I wish I knew what was best and could tell you how to proceed. What feedback are you getting from the specialist? Ultimately, you have to trust your intuition and go with what you think is best. You know your girl better than anyone and would have a better grasp on what her quality of life truly is. Saying goodbye may be the most loving option and only way to prevent unnecessary suffering. I hope you find the answers you need to navigate this difficult path. Praying for comfort and peace for you and your pup. Bless you both. ♥
Our Lilly is almost 14 and she is an weimepeak a Chesapeake and weimereiner mix. We have 3 kids under 9 and we started having problems with our Lilly when I was pregnant with my last. We thought it was just the changes we were experiencing as a family but it did get better for a short bit after birth but the last 4 years she doesn’t settle at night. She locks herself in rooms, paces all night, she tries to sleep during the day and frequently pees on her bed. She still loves walks and going outside but she is starting to bark at things as her sight and hearing is going. She’s always under my feet and I can’t leave her at home alone at all. She will lock herself into a room and destroy the door or try to climb on beds and rip them apart looking for comfort. She’s super attached to me and miserable if I’m away and miserable if I’m asleep. She barks at us to wake us up in the morning so she can “sleep” her anxiety and fear is so bad! We have her on gabbapenton and trazadone. We give her melatonin and benedryl.. she also has heartworms so we can’t take her outside to run even though I think she still has some desire to do so. I feel terrible. I’m so tired. It’s like I have had a newborn for the last 4 years.
Hi Heather,
I feel for you! In many ways, it is like you have had a newborn for the past four years in addition to having your human kids to care for. What a difficult, heartbreaking, and exhausting situation for you and Lilly. It sounds like you are already trying many of the tactics that sometimes work well for anxiety and/or cognitive decline, but with minimal success at this point. As I’m sure you recognize, this level of anxiety and confusion is detrimental to her quality of life and yours too. And it definitely puts a strain on your bond. Have you talked to your vet about how bad things have gotten? Sometimes it is easier to recognize the effects physical ailments have on our dogs, but conditions like severe anxiety can be crippling for dogs too. And in those situations, the time might come with the kindest thing you can do is to decide to set a dog free from the prison of his or her mind. Thinking about you as you wrestle with how best to help Lilly. ❤️
I have a chihuahua named Gracie. She not only is a rescue dog but had a previous owner before us so her absolute age is unknown. We’d been told she was an estimated 9-11 years old upon her arrival to us, and have had her for about 7 years. Based off of that she’s an estimated 16-18 years old today but we aren’t absolutely sure.
Gracie in her prime with us was a chubby, lazy dog who never liked toys or being picked up or cuddled up in bed. She’d like to be alone but with somebody- much like me lol. She enjoys her personal space, though she likes to always be AROUND me, standing behind me or sitting at my feet, and pets/scratches. She’d always picked a spot in our house and for anywhere between months to years claim it as her own and lay there all day unless it was time for walks, to follow me when I leave from her spot of choice, or when she smelled table food being cooked. She always shivered as if she was cold or scared, but nothing came of that other than the nickname Shivers. Throughout the years she’d never really had uncontrollable accidents (beyond a UTI once) unless she’d not been walked on schedule (I take her on 3 short-ish walks throughout the day) and as far as sickness goes she’d have occasional diarrhea, vomiting, or again, once, a UTI in 2020 but never frequently (knock on wood) but nothing out of norm or super crazy. We’ve taken her to the vet too as she had bad breath since day one of having her, who informed us she had gum disease but due to lack of funds we instead opted to treat it at home. Otherwise her health was fine.
I’d say within the last two to three years, everything remained the same above except her weight, as she’d lost a lot of weight slowly where as now she is admittedly very skinny, and a few added things I’d chalk to her old age. She never had any majorly concerning health issues as her weight loss was gradual, not sudden but she did develop a sneeze and seems to be hard of breathing (she has frequent short breaths and does an occasional deep inhale followed by a deep exhale) and it doesn’t help that her shiver never went away. Her walk has slowed but not lethargically. It almost seems like it’s only as she walks and she just likes to stroll during her walks now instead of her normal trot as in the house her walk isn’t as slow as outside, and she ran around and hopped fine. I did notice more recently that in one of her back paws she’d seem to lift it as if there was something in her paw, but only slightly, as she walked. I checked her paws and nothing was in any of them so I left it alone but always noticed it. Again only occasional diarrhea maybe a few times a year and no vomiting beyond maybe eating something bad or rarely an unknown cause. I’d say the biggest red flag is that sometimes she won’t go down the steps unless the light is on which would indicate problems with her sight but even now as I type this in a dark room so we can go to bed, we’re making direct eye contact so I’m not sure what that’s about. She also developed red paws (she’s a white dog with cream colored spots) but majority of that went away until a few days ago.
Due to a disagreement in my house, I (female, 19) left with my Gracie staying there as I couldn’t take her with me where I went for almost three months. I’d check in on her about twice a week, walk and pet her before leaving again for the first month but less as time went on as I started a new job and don’t drive in addition to trying to avoid my mother, so I couldn’t find myself home frequently. However despite me being the primary care taker of her since we’ve gotten her 7 years ago, I considered her the family dog and thought she’d be cared for how I had cared for her all this time. It wasn’t until my return home 3 days ago that I could see I was mistaken. When Gracie had saw me, she’d gotten so excited but when she stood up couldn’t seem to walk or stand straight or stand up on her hind legs. Though alarming enough, when I went to walk her she couldn’t get down the steps and would JUMP down the steps, falling and landing crazy! I couldn’t believe my eyes, and was so confused quickly realizing her hind legs were to blame and saw they were red from her paw to her joint. This plus the accidents on my room carpet including diarrhea told me over the course of almost 3 months, she wasn’t being walked frequently at all, and they’d switched her food to a different brand and big hard kibbles (when I usually opted for small chewy ones on account of her teeth) which clearly didn’t sit right on her stomach. According to my mother wasn’t leaving her spot in my room. To paint a picture our house is three stories with my room being on the third. Because Gracie always follows me around, in addition to walks she’d be following me up and down, up and down two flights of stairs repeatedly throughout the day sometimes more than me as she’d branch off then come back where I was- now I’m hearing she wasn’t doing that at all. What I gather is that the slight limp I’d noticed was a sign that she had developing issues with her hind leg but due to how frequently she was being exercised it was able to subside. Now with lack of exercise, her hind legs have nearly lost mobility. I was heart broken to see my baby had been so neglected without me, and the look of excitement on her face said it all.
I immediately over the last few days have switched her food back, and can tell she’s eating better and more already. She’s back to running around, back to her daily walks, following me around the house(by force and by choice lol I want her moving as much as possible) and with my help she’s now able to go down the steps again without jumping, though she still struggles with going up. She’s been able to get up from the first to second floor all by herself and I’m so proud of her! She also with me helping her start, has been able to finish the flights of steps on her own. I’m also working on her standing on her hind legs and can already see her able to hold up just a bit longer so my hope is that over time she’ll be back to normal on her hind legs. However my biggest concern now is that because of her old age I get paranoid and constantly examine her. Upon examining her today I noticed a lump on her stomach that could be a serious problem. It doesn’t seem to be painful as I touch on it.
So now here’s the reason I wrote her whole life story: I wonder if I should put her down. Is her quality of life bad? My Gracie has a bright face with a few slight additions of behavior over the past years, I really think she has more life to live! Even down to watch her relearn exercising her hind legs, she seems so motivated to try and seems to be quickly learning. I just fear if I put her down, she’ll still have had more fight in her. I wish she could just talk to me and let me know, but to me her eyes say it! She doesn’t give lethargic or non-eager. She doesn’t mope around or walk slow, and even when she falls she gets back up. It’s like she wants to finish life with ME and I want nothing more than that. I want to take her to the vet but I fear they’ll only give me two options: a surgery I can’t afford, or suggest I put her down and yes they’re professionals but I just don’t think she’s in a state that suggests she doesn’t want to live anymore or is I’m too much pain or suffering to do so. If I falsely put her down, I’d never forgive myself. What are your thoughts? Based off of everything I said, do you think her quality of life when I’m present isn’t worth living? I genuinely want what’s best for my little old lady, and could use advice. Whether it be the vet visit regardless just to get an update on her state, or to put her down I’m all ears as I’m in this alone financially and mentally at such a young age. My mother kind of seems to think she’s old so she’s ran her course, and has been suggesting for years I put her down despite Gracie not showing signs of needing to be (until at the very least recently and it seems my absence + her lack of care is what did that). It just seemed my mother wanted to give up on her years ago but I see the life in her because I take care of her, and tear up thinking about putting her down because looking into her eyes I swear I see the fight! She’s my best friend and I just want to do right by her. I’m sorry for such a lengthy comment, and I hope to hear back from you.
Hello Mecca,
What a special and treasured pup Gracie is. I can tell from her story how much you love her and how dedicated you are to caring for her. I’m so sorry that it took me awhile to be able to reply to your comment. I know by now you may have already made a decision about how to proceed. But just in case it is helpful, I wanted to suggest going ahead with a consultation with your vet if you haven’t already. He or she would be able to give you an idea of if some pain medications or other medical interventions could potentially improve Gracie’s life (beyond the amazing improvements you have already accomplished in the short time since you have been back) and also help provide another opinion about her quality of life. From what you have written, I am confident that you know her well and are in tune to what she needs, and I think it speaks volumes that you are so concerned with ensuring that her quality of life is good. She is in great hands with you! I hope you were able to find clarity and peace surrounding whatever you decided to do.
I”m having a difficult time deciding if it’s time. My 13 year old miniature poodle has lost his sight and hearing, he wears diapers all day and hasn’t been outside in a year. The sun bothers his eyes so bad, that he can’t maneuver once back inside. He walks in circles, into everything or will just stand and stare. I’ve read all the articles, so I’m sure he has dementia . I know you all may think I’m crazy not to see all the signs!!! He still eats, poops and pees, and knows his way around the house. I keep saying when he can no longer walk, it’s time. I think I need someone to say, it’s time!
Dear Diane,
I am sorry you are facing this emotional decision for your senior boy. From what you describe, your little guy is dealing with confusion and cognitive dysfunction daily. Just because he can eat and walk doesn’t mean he is happy or has a good quality of life. Do you think he is truly living or just existing? I always think it is better to say goodbye one day too early rather than one day too late and allow unnecessary suffering. Sometimes saying goodbye is the most loving option and only way to give a beloved pup peace and rest. If you are considering making a choice to give him a peaceful passing, I think that would be fitting for your current situation. I hope you can find the answers and strength you need to find the best way forward. Bless you and your sweet boy.
on your checklist of assement of 9 things for dogs my 16 yr. old Pugarian only has 4 yes.
She still eats regularly and has urinary/bowel movemts normally. I will take your recommendations I read here to add to her quality of life.
Thank You. Mary Guy
Hello, we have a 12 year old maltipoo named Benji. He is almost completely blind, he does not like to go on walks anymore, he doesn’t interact with us anymore he walks in circles and gets stuck in corners or under furniture. His haircuts and baths have become more difficult to acomplish. He uses diapers all day and night because of constant accidents. The only thing that I see he still does is he get excited when I bring him inside from going number 2 and wants he reward, that’s about it. I feel bad because my daughter is 12 and basically had known benji all her life, so she is super attached. I just thinks he is not there anymore. He also has bladder stones and osteoarthritis. I hive him calming and cognition bites and cosequin. My Husband thinks is cruel to put him to sleep, and I feel bad that I just don’t have the time that he requires now any more. I don’t know what to do
Hi Viviana,
What a difficult situation to be facing. It is so hard to consider having to say goodbye to a beloved dog, and then thinking about your daughter losing the dog she has known her whole life just makes it even harder. My heart goes out to you because I know firsthand the pain of having to watch my children say goodbye to our dog Luke. It sounds like Benji has had a wonderful life with you and that you have taken great care of him, so don’t for a moment let yourself feel guilty that you aren’t doing enough for him or feel like you don’t have the time he needs. Caring for a elderly dog who is declining is difficult, but you are doing a great job.
My dear friend Dr. Dawnetta Woodruff wrote a beautiful article about deciding when to euthanize a dog with dementia that I think might help provide some clarity. I’ll link it below. I hope that you are able to come to an agreement as a family about what is best for Benji, and that you can find peace with whatever you decide.❤️
Here is the article I mentioned: Dementia in Dogs: When to Euthanize Your Beloved Senior Dog
I have a 13 year old (14 in two months) rat terrier who has been having issues with her bowels for about a year. Bella cannot be in her crate while we are at work without defecating before we arrive home. I am giving baths daily. Likewise, she cannot make it through the night and has accidents in the house nightly. When we crate her, she will howl for long periods of time, so we do not crate her at night. She is on the same diet as our diabetic dog, so I don’t feel like poor food quality is the issue with her bowels. Our vet cannot find any issues with the blood work they did, and we cannot afford to do more in-depth tests. She is also deaf and almost completely blind.
Last week, I noticed she was moving a lot slower and by 2pm, she could not bear weight on her hind legs. We went to the vet and she has lost 3 pounds since October, has lost a lot of muscle mass, and has arthritis. Our vet said she probably has a small crack in her spine after examining her, but I couldn’t afford x-rays. He gave her a cortisone shot and some prednisone and she was able to walk later that evening. We are weaning off the prednisone now and I am noticing today she is wobbly while walking.
All this to say, her heart, lungs, and skin are ok for her age. I am a teacher on summer break, so I have been able to spend more time with her, but I don’t know if we can keep this up when I go back to work full time. I am heartbroken thinking about euthanasia because she still seeks me out and loves to sit with me when I have time.
If she begins to lose the ability to hold her weight again, how long can we keep doing cortisone shots? I cannot afford surgery. Her quality of life has drastically declined over the past year, and my fun-loving, active puppy is not herself. It’s heartbreaking. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
Hi Lee,
What a difficult situation. I’m so sorry to hear that Bella has been facing so many health problems recently. Since I haven’t examined her, I can’t give you a specific idea of how long the cortisone injections will be safe or effective. Your veterinarian should be able to give you some guidance though. It is also possible that she may respond well to non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drugs (NSAIDs), other pain medications, joint supplements, omega-3 fatty acids, or other medications or therapies if the injections don’t end up being the right choice long term.
Since you are concerned that her quality of life is declining (and I would agree based on what you have said), it may also be worth talking to your vet about some other ways to improve quality of life. Sometimes pain medications (as mentioned above), medications or supplements for cognitive decline, or other interventions can be helpful. But unfortunately, in other situations, the kindest thing is to start considering euthanasia, as heartbreaking as that is. I’ve included the links to a few of our other articles that may be helpful as you evaluate Bella’s quality of life.
I hope that the way forward becomes clear, whatever that ends up being. Thinking of you.
1. Dementia in Dogs: When to Euthanize Your Beloved Senior Dog
2. When to Euthanize a Dog With Arthritis: A Vet’s Heartfelt Advice
We have the most beautiful Cockerpoo Oscar, who is approaching 15. He has most if not all signs of doggy dementia pacing, circling, we only manage to catch the toilet incidences by taking him out hourly He is awake a lot during the night and sleeps much of the day. He is obsessed by food and starts barking to be fed between 4.30 and 5.30 a.m. ( we tried altering food patterns, feeding later in the evening etc but we just wake to a kitchen of trampled poo). He has one stiff back leg therefore cannot manage steps( he just jumps from the top one so all steps/ stairs are blocked off.,)
. He has very little interest in us or toys can be grumpy if I pet him. We take it in turns at getting up with him but are both shattered . I also have a 22yr old daughter who seems to think he is fine, when I told her I have booked an appointment to speak to the vet about his quality of life she flared up and said why don’t I just book him in to be euthanized. She is rarely at home and does very little in the way of caring for him when she is. My boys who no longer live at home feel he is deteriating quickly and agree he is doing little more than existing. Are we being selfish or is it time to consider saying goodbye to our beloved boy. Crying as I type this.
Dear Denise,
My heart aches for you as you face this difficult decision for Oscar. From what you describe, his quality of life has greatly diminished, and he is struggling daily with confusion and anxiety. I do think in this situation that saying goodbye may be the most loving option. I am sorry you are dealing with the emotional reactions from your daughter, but she is probably just hurting and doesn’t know how to process her feelings about letting go so it comes out as anger. If you didn’t check out the links provided at the bottom of the article, I highly recommend you look through those articles as well as the comments left by other readers. Specifically Preparing for Your Dog’s Euthanasia: 10 Thoughts for Peace
Here is another article you may find especially helpful: Dementia in Dogs: When to Euthanize Your Beloved Senior Dog
I am hopeful you will find the advice you need to make the best choice for everyone involved. Praying for strength and clarity. Bless you all. ♥
I have two, 17-year old dachshunds. Sasha has an enlarged heart, cushings and kidney failure. She drinks water constantly and wakes me up 3-5 times a night for water and to go out and potty. I’m exhausted. She eats well off and on but has lost about 3 lbs in the last 6 months. Scotty has advanced dementia, bad cataracts, and will only eat baked chicken. They both have extreme anxiety which causes frequent diarrhea. We are strapped to staying home now because we can’t travel with either one of them. They both sleep all day and never play anymore. Scotty does however get excited when my husband comes home because he likes to go in the front yard. At what point do we realize we also have no quality of life. I feel selfish saying that.
Dear Kim,
My heart goes out to you with this difficult situation you are in with both of your senior Dachshunds. You are not alone and please hear me when I say that your quality of life matters too!!! I can only imagine the stress you are under on a daily basis. How do you continue to function with lack of sleep and the weight of being a full-time care giver? I know you don’t want to consider euthanasia out of convenience, but that is not how I see your situation. Both of your pups are struggling, and it sounds like they are merely surviving instead of truly living. Saying goodbye may be the most loving option. If you have not utilized the links to other articles at the bottom of this page, I highly recommend it. They are full of great information and advice from other readers. I hope you can find the answers you need to make the best choices for everyone involved. Praying for your strength as you navigate this emotional path. Bless you.
I am suffering greatly trying to make a decision on euthanizing my 9 year old dachschund Rocky. Rocky has Stage 4 kidney disease. He was diagnosed in March 2022 with CKD and has already made it much longer than we anticipated he would. This is is the result of a great deal of loving effort and financial commitment on our famiies part. We love him so much and he is a member of our family. He is now having a great deal of trouble keeping food down but in all other respects he seems like he is doing well. He plays, wags his tail and looks forward to his time with us I just don’t know how I can euthanize a beloved pet who is wagging his tail and playing with me one minute and several minutes later is vomiting.
I am in constant contact with my vet and he has told me what others have told me, “You will know when it is time”. This has been a 14 month roller coaster.
Hi Mike,
Making the decision to say goodbye to a beloved canine family member can be so difficult, and I’m sorry that you are currently in that position with Rocky. It sounds like you are taking amazing care of him, and I’m so glad you have gotten over a year of good quality time with him since his CKD diagnosis. Is he currently taking any anti-nausea medication? If not, perhaps that is something you can ask your vet about as controlling his vomiting could help his quality of life.
In terms of the “you will know when it is time” comments (which are well meaning, but vague), you may want to check out an article my dear friend and end-of-life care veterinarian Dr. Woodruff wrote that does a great job outlining how to know when to euthanize a dog with kidney failure. I’ll link it at the bottom in case you want to read it. And I’ll include the links to our other blogs on kidney failure in case they are helpful.
Thinking about you as you try to figure out the right timing for euthanasia for Rocky and your family (because there isn’t just one universal right time). I hope that you find peace with whatever decision you make and can treasure the time you have together.
1. Dog Kidney Failure: When to Euthanize Your Dear Dog
2. Kidney Failure in Dogs: A Comprehensive Guide
3. Kidney Disease in Dogs: Stages and What They Mean For Your Dog
My dog Rubi is a Bichon, Shitzu, Poodle mix. I got her when I was 17. She was my first baby and I was absolutely obsessed with her.
I’m now 30, I have a husband, and two kids (8 and 5). Both my husband and I have busy schedules between running our own business and having two school age children.
Rubi was always the biggest joy of my life. She used to run, bark, play, and always looked like she had a smile on her face. When I had given birth to my now 8 year old, Rubi was in love with him. She was always playful, fun, and wanted to be on top of him all the time. When my daughter came along, she had started to calm down a bit but still actively pursued our kids and us.
When my daughter was about 2 years old (almost 3 years ago), I started noticing a difference in Rubi. She wasn’t really barking when people came to the door anymore, she was slow when she walked, her hearing and sight weren’t great, and she seemed to always be hungry. She started walking around for no reason in the evenings, almost incessantly, and listening to her nails on hard woods in the evening when you’re trying to rest is awful. Also, she got to where she was always searching for food. She would cry and cry following the kids around if they ever had food, she would try to break into the trash can to get whatever she could, and she would eat cat litter, poop, puke… you name it. If it was “edible” she was going yo eat it.
Her legs now shake, her breath is awful, she does not enjoy being petted or receiving affection anymore, she’s nearly deaf and blind, she wanders around our back yard when it’s potty time and will almost always end up getting confused about where she’s at and end up on our neighbors porch trying to get into their house.
Sadly, over the last 3 years, she acts like she is most terrified of me, never wants to be near me, and will walk away from me if I ever approach her… I think this is maybe because I’m the only one in the family that bathes her, grooms her, clips her nails, etc., which she hates and is terrified of, so I feel like she sees me as someone that is going to “hurt” her. She also has what I think are giant cysts all over her body and if I ever touch them she acts as if they are painful and doesn’t want me to touch them… again she doesn’t want me touching her anyway, so maybe they don’t hurt her.l and it’s just me she doesn’t want to be around.
As time goes on, we are seeing Rubi as almost something that just exists in our home and has no presence, which makes me sad because she used to have the most incredible presence of all. Going up and down stairs is difficult and she is having far more frequent pottying accidents inside, when she literally never use to potty in the house. The worst part was we tried to put her in a cage to keep her from roaming around the house, pottying, and tearing up trash, but when we got home we were terrified to see her covered in blood. She was so panicked and so scared that she made her claws and teeth bleed just trying to get out. This dog was crate trained her whole life and never had any issues with going into a crate, but now we can’t even put her in a bathroom without her biting and clawing our door to death.
I’ve never wanted to euthanize my dog, and always assumed she would just fall asleep one day and that would be it. However, my husband and I are having to have real discussions about this, because we aren’t sure what else to do. The shaking makes us wonder if she’s in pain, and everything else just points to what looks to be possible dementia.
Based on this information, do you think Rubi’s time with us is coming to an end and that euthanasia would be the most humane decision for her at this point? Or should we hold on a little longer? More than anything I just want her to be happy and to feel loved -and to not be in pain. If she isn’t happy, doesn’t want to be around the people that love her most, and might possibly be in pain, it’s making me feel like maybe we should have had this discussion 2 years ago and not made her suffer to this point.
I’m just feeling sad, scared, and guilty. I know she isn’t herself anymore but I just don’t know how to say goodbye. It breaks my heart.
Dear Rachel,
My heart aches for you and this difficult decision you are facing for Rubi. What you describe definitely sounds like dementia/cognitive dysfunction and I am certain this type of mental decline is causing suffering for your girl. I cant imagine how hard it must be for her to daily struggle with confusion, anxiety, pain, and lack of joy in her favorite activities. I know you don’t want to choose euthanasia out of convenience, but that is not how I see your situation. Saying goodbye may be the most loving option and only way to give your sweet girl peace. The other articles mentioned at the bottom of this page are great resources and have lots of valuable information and comments from other readers. I think you will find these two to be especially fitting for what you are dealing with:
1. Dementia in Dogs: When to Euthanize Your Beloved Senior Dog
2. Preparing for Your Dog’s Euthanasia: 10 Thoughts for Peace
I hope you can find the advice you need to make the best decision for everyone involved. Praying for comfort for your heart. Bless you all.
This is so similar to my situation symptom wise, 15.5 yr old Sheltie that was diagnosed at 5 with Cushing’s which I treated until he turned 12. We have an appt tomorrow and this is gonna be a tough one.
Hi Terri,
My heart goes out to you as you face this difficult situation with your Sheltie. Praying for your strength and comfort.
I have a 13.5 year old mini dachshund who seems to be displaying some symptoms. He limps at times but seems to be better on a CBD mobility treat. I do think he had moderate to severe arthritis. He doesnt do stairs well anymore. He seems to not be able to get comfortable at night. He paces and will lay down for a few moments and then pace again. He shakes at times and seems very anxious. He sleeps all day and doesn’t greet us like he used to. He had bad cataracts. His appetite is still good. He will sleep a lot during the day. He had occasional accidents. Some days seem better than others. He doesn’t physically seem too bad, but is declining. I just wonder if mentally he’s declining faster than we realize.
Hi Teryn,
I understand your concern for your senior Dachshund and this mental decline you are witnessing. From what you describe, I do think he is struggling with dementia/cognitive dysfunction. I will attach links to other articles with more information and great comments from other readers. Determining quality of life when there are mental issues present can be very hard, especially when physically he seems to be doing ok. I think you are doing the right thing by reaching out for advice. Your pup is lucky to have you advocating for his health and well-being. I am hopeful you will find the answers you need to know when difficult decisions have to be made. Wishing you the best as you navigate this unknown path. Bless you both.
1. Canine Cognitive Dysfunction in Dogs: Signs, Symptoms, Solutions
2. 5 Signs of Dementia in Dogs and What to Do About Them
3. Dementia in Dogs: When to Euthanize Your Beloved Senior Dog
Renal illness is a long goodbye for most people. My dog is currently at Stage 2, and has been given most likely months to live. It is important to me and my husband not to let her suffer at all. We just love her too much as she has been our beloved family pet for 15 years. It is going to be a terrible, terrible day, but I rather take the emotional pain of putting her down, than let her suffer physical pain. My young adult daughters all agree with us, as they grew up with her. I am going to closely monitor her health decline with my vet, while doing as much as I can diet wise and prescription wise to stave this off, but I will let her go once I know she is starting to feel bad and her quality of life degrades and pain or discomfort levels amp up in any fashion. I do not want her in agony of any form.
Hi Mary,
I agree with everything you have said. I think it is the ultimate act of love to be willing to let your own heart break, so your sweet girl doesn’t have to suffer needlessly. I hope her condition will remain stable for as long as possible, and her decline will be smooth and slow. Make the most of each day you are gifted. Bless you and your family. ♥
My only 7 year old Basenji is nearing the end. Three years ago she was diagnosed with Fanconi Syndrome, which ultimately leads to kideny failure. She drinks water constantly and has to take 14 pills a day for this disease. She is now blind and this makes her constant trips to the doggy door much more difficult. Just within the last year or so she has rapidly declined even more. She screams out randomly and fights me on taking her daily pills. She has been taking Gabapenton for a couple weeks now but this doesnt seem to help her comfort. We cannot pick her up without her screaming out, and sometimes she will just be standing there and scream. She seems lost or confused most of the time when she is not sleeping. The vet has told us different reasons why she might be screaming out but even with gabapenton it has not slowed or stopped. With the contant pee all over her bedding and mopping the floors 2x a day, I am exhausted. I feel so bad that I want to give up on her. I love her so much and I dont want to feel guilty for giving up on her. I have taked it over with my children and husband and everyone seems to have wrapped their heads around putting her down but me. After reading this and going through the checklist, I am now thinking it may be time now. I keep waiting on some super drastic moment where it is totally obviuos that she needs to be put down but I know she does not have a good quality of life right now. I just dont want to make this decision to soon and regret it.
Dear Andrea,
My heart goes out to you with this difficult situation you are facing with your senior girl. Many of the symptoms you describe sound like advanced dementia or cognitive dysfunction. I know you don’t want to give up on your girl, but sometimes saying goodbye is the most loving option and the only way to offer them freedom from their struggles. I always think it is better to let go one day too early rather than one day too late and allow unnecessary suffering. I will attach some links to other articles with more information and great advice from other readers. I hope you can find the answers you need to make the best decision for everyone involved. Praying for your comfort and strength. Bless you both.
1. Dementia in Dogs: When to Euthanize Your Beloved Senior Dog
2. How Will You Know When It’s Time to Euthanize Your Dog? 5 Caring, Heartfelt Messages
3. Preparing for Your Dog’s Euthanasia: 10 Thoughts for Peace
Thank you for writing this article – and so many others on this site; I have read a lot of them in the last few days, I am really struggling with my elderly whippet. She turned 13 last month, but I almost euthanised her in December because she was so poorly. I have had her for nearly 4 years, she came to me as a rescue that nobody wanted because of her health conditions. The former owner had tried to drown her, but she survived being thrown into the river. This is obviously good but she breathed in a lot of water and ended up pneumonia, bronchitis and scarring to her lungs. She has never been fully ‘well’ since and the only way to manage her condition – which is basically COPD/chronic bronchitis – has been to have her on as low a dose of prednisolone as would keep her lung condition stable. She was on the steroids for quite some time before I adopted her, and has been for pretty much the whole time she has been with me – I gather four years on daily steroids is a long time. Unsurprisingly, she now lives with a raft of symptoms from steroids use – basically Cushings disease. She is hungry and thirsty all the time and I am constantly cleaning up wees. She is tired and sometimes gets stuck in the kitchen because she can’t manage the stairs up out again. She has never been much of a walker but she hates going out for walks so basically she doesn’t. I take her for a little potter sometimes but she doesn’t seem to enjoy it at all and just trudges along like she just has to get through it.
As she has aged, I think there is some CCD creeping in too as these seem to be more than just ‘accidents’ where she couldn’t get out quick enough. The last few weeks, she has just urinated in the house without even trying to tell me that she needs to go out. Recently there have been some poos as well. She will often walk into a room and just stand there as if she doesn’t know what she is doing there, but most of the time during the day, she is asleep. I don’t know what amount of sleep is normal for an elderly dog. She looks increasingly tired and to me like she has had enough, but when we get to the vet, the adrenaline perks her up and her lungs have been pretty good lately, so the vet’s assessment is that she is doing well.
I mentioned that I nearly had her euthanised in December. After so many years of me struggling with the side effects of the steroids, we tried to wean her off of them and see how she would respond to just being on Theophylline (a broncho-dilator she has been on for about three years alongside the prednisolone.) While the symptoms of Cushings disease eased, of course the lung condition for which she was on the steroids deteriorated over the course of a few weeks.
We went to the vet and he said that if I wanted to euthanise, he would not disagree with my decision. But I didn’t want to say goodbye to my little dog in the noise of the vet surgery so we arranged for me to take her home and him to come to our house. This appointment was almost a week later. In that time, we put her back on the steroids at the maximum dose. On the day of the appointment, she was doing well, so I cancelled it.
And this is where I am now. The prednisolone stabilised her and I was able over time to get the dose back down to the lowest we managed before. She is still on Theophylline as well. She has codeine too when her cough pops up. But all the side effects are back and I am cleaning wee up several times a day. I haven’t had a full night’s sleep in weeks. I am exhausted and resent her, I hate to admit it. A couple of weeks ago she was under my feet in the kitchen because I was preparing food and I tripped over her andI was so angry at her for being in the way. What made it worse, is that when I tripped, I also trod on her food and we suspect broke a toe (or at least sprained it). So now she has a big bandage on her foot. It made me realise how much i do love her and I hated myself for how angry and fed up with her I have become over the last year or so. So we have had a couple of weeks of me really appreciating her but as the time goes on and I’m constantly stepping into a puddle of wee I didn’t know about or finding a poo or being kept awake all night with her crying but having no idea what is wrong, gradually I am slipping down the resentment slope again.
The steroids keep the lung condition largely at bay, but I increasingly feel I can’t live like this. It feels like my quality of life is completely unimportant and that I have to keep her going even though the side effects are causing me a massive amount of stress and impacting the relationship I have with her. That sounds so selfish but my vet has made clear she is as well as he would expect her to be and he wouldn’t be comfortable euthanising her now.
What I haven’t mentioned until now is that this is a multidog household with a 7 year old dog and an 11 month old pup. They aren’t getting what they need from me because I am consumed by looking after the old girl – and when I am not looking after her (or working for a living), I am shattered from the lack of sleep. So my relationships with them are also suffering. I am also on my own and while I have friends that care and sometimes one will take the elderly dog for a day so I get a break, it isn’t the same as having someone to share all this work with.
How do I manage this? She’s only ‘well’ because of the prednisolone. If I take her off that, she will get ill and die from bronchitis or pneumonia. But leaving her on it means we struggle through the symptoms of Cushings disease – yet it appears her kidneys aren’t affected so she’s not ‘ill’ with Cushings. Our home is not a happy one anymore. I am tired and irritable all the time, but the thought of euthanising her because of the impact on me feels so unbelievably selfish and I know I would be eaten up with guilt as well as grief.
There doesn’t seem to be a way forward that doesn’t involve misery all round.
Dear Whippet Mum,
My heart aches for you and this difficult situation you are in with your senior girl. I wish I could reach out and give you a hug. I completely understand where you are coming from. I have been in your shoes! It is a horrible feeling to know that the bond you share with your sweet girl is broken because of stress and caregiver fatigue. But it is reality, and you are not alone! Your quality of life matters too! Your pup can feel the tension and it isn’t fair to either one of you. I know your vet is looking at the “physical issues” and saying your dog is well. But I honestly believe the suffering caused by mental issues can be just as bad if not worse than physical disease. From what you describe, your girl is struggling daily with respiratory issues, medication side effects, incontinence, confusion, and lethargy. That does not sound like a great quality of life to me. I understand you don’t want to consider euthanasia out of convenience, but that is not how I see this situation. Sometimes saying goodbye is the most loving option and the only way to offer peace and rest to a beloved dog. You both deserve better and letting go doesn’t make you a bad person. I hope you can find the answers you need to make the best decision for everyone involved. Please don’t hesitate to reach out to a house call/hospice vet in your area. They can partner with you and help guide you down this difficult path. Wishing you strength to face tomorrow and comfort for your heart. Bless you both. ♥
Thank you for this article. Our boy Max is an 11-year-old Australian shepherd that we were to believe had osteoarthritis, but now are finding he also has more neurological issues. Seems to be degenerative myelopathy. He’s having quite a bit of trouble walking. He does not seem to be in pain, but he does not get to do many of the activities that he likes to anymore- like taking walks. He can still get up on his own – especially when a treat is mentioned. He still likes to walk to the fence and bark at the neighbor dogs. He eats with gusto and drinks normally. He is not yet incontinent. He had some bleeding out of a nostril over the weekend so I took him to the vet. She assessed his quality of life and suggested that we euthanize him within the week. I was frankly shocked at that news. At home he does move around quite a bit and is still so loving and happy. I am struggling with that timeline. I also know it will never be easy because he is my very dear friend. I realize his lack of mobility is difficult with his back legs. His front legs are good and with some assistance he can walk fairly well. I don’t know if I’m being selfish, blind to his condition, or just unable to accept his fate. I know my vet has the best of intentions too so that is weighing heavily on my mind. This is beyond difficult.
Hi Kylee,
I am so sorry you are facing this difficult situation with Max. Making the choice to say goodbye is extremely emotional and often not straight forward. I understand why you are hesitant. From what you describe, I do not think it would cause unnecessary suffering if you wanted to wait a bit longer, but also don’t think you have much time before Max’s quality of life is poor. Your vet is probably trying to communicate what I often recommend to readers: I would rather let go one day too early than wait one day too late. I highly recommend you check out the extra links to other articles mentioned at the bottom of the page. Those blogs have some wonderful advice and comments from other readers that may give you the information you need to make the best choice for you and Max. Wishing you peace and comfort. Give your sweet boy a hug for me. ♥
I am so glad I found this article.
I have an almost 15 year old shih tzu who is blind, deaf, as of late is incontinent of both bladder and bowels several times a day, has had seizures almost daily for the past year or so which is now being treated by phenobarbital, and has all the signs of canine dementia. We have 3 other animals and I am sole caregiver most of the time and I am completely exhausted. My husband works away on a rotational basis and both of our daughters are no longer living at home. Although it is heart wrenching to think about it, I really think her time with us is nearing an end. One of my daughters really can’t accept the fact that our dogs quality of life has run it’s course, and she gets angry when I mention her end.
I guess basically what I have been searching to find answers for has finally been found in this article. I think I’mreally needing someone to tell me it’s ok to let her go and that I should not feel guilty.
Thank you for this.
Dear Kelly,
I am sorry you are facing this difficult decision for your senior pup. You definitely should not feel guilty for considering saying goodbye under these circumstances. From what you describe, your sweet girl is struggling and letting go may be the most loving option. I am glad you found the article to be helpful and comforting. I pray you will find the right way to help your daughter understand. Wishing you strength to face this uncertain road ahead. Bless you. ♥
Thank you for a very helpful, insightful article. We are facing this decision with our 15 yr old min pin. Ember has bouts of pancreatitis and most recently vestibular disease. Eyesight ,hearing and mobility and balance have all diminished significantly. As I’m writing this, I realize it’s not a great presentation for quality of life . She has started to have bowel movements in the middle of each night ; which she tries to eat. She is on a restrictive diet and takes gabepentin. She virtually sleeps all day and must be confined if we are not home and at night to prevent her from hurting herself and bowel accidents. She has a good appetite and while she doesn’t appear to have pain -it is so hard to tell. Vet has been supportive with letting us determine her quality – but I’m wondering if we are at the ” are we being selfish” point. Thank you for listening.
Dear Anne Marie,
I am sorry Ember’s health is starting to decline. It does sound like her cognitive function is deteriorating and she has many symptoms of dementia. I am glad you found the article to be helpful and informative. I will be praying for you to have clarity in your decision making as you navigate this uncertain path. Wishing you both peace and comfort.
I am about to have Teddy put to sleep, but I’m finding it very difficult to make the decision. He has diabetes which I feel is not controlled on injections morning and night. He is blind, deaf and incontinent and has epilepsy, controlled on phenobarbital. the floors have to be mopped daily and have become very slippery due to the excess moisture in the house.. He also has a lump on his liver which leaves him only months to live.
On the other hand, he does not seem to be suffering unduly and finds his way around well. The only reason I’m asking is that I’m moving at the end of the month and feel it is better to put him to sleep now rather than have the move exacerbate his condition and have to have him euthenased then.. Your article was very helpful. I think I’m feeling so guilty about this because there’s a large element of owner exhaustion, made worse by a fall I had last night on the slippery floor
Dear Kerry,
I am so sorry you are facing this difficult decision for Teddy. It sounds like he is nearing the end of his days and saying goodbye may be the most loving option. I can only imagine the stress and fatigue you must be dealing with due to being a constant caregiver to Teddy. It is never wrong to consider your quality of life as well as that of your pup. If Teddy is already dealing with symptoms of dementia and loss of sight, I do think moving could be especially difficult for him. I will attach links to other articles with more information and advice from readers. I hope you can find the answers you need to make the best choice for you and your sweet boy. Bless you both.
1. Dementia in Dogs: When to Euthanize Your Beloved Senior Dog
2. Preparing for Your Dog’s Euthanasia: 10 Thoughts for Peace
3. How Will You Know When It’s Time to Euthanize Your Dog? 5 Caring, Heartfelt Messages
Thank you for such an informative article. I sadly am faced with this task already. Time had flown by and my Lucy is 10 now and considered elderly. She’s displaying most of the conditions you’ve listed. I still need to read the links provided. But this is incredibly difficult. I knew it would be but it doesn’t make it any easier to deal with. But again thanks, I downloaded your quality of life evaluator. it seemed most pertinent.
Dear Willa,
I am sorry Lucy is nearing the end of her days. I am glad you have found the article to be helpful and hope the links will provide extra advice and comfort in this difficult decision you are facing. Praying for your strength. Bless you both. ♥